


A mile in your shoes

by SmileDesu



Series: Wicked - a Billy/Loki compilation [1]
Category: Loki: Agent of Asgard, Young Avengers
Genre: Body Swap, M/M, eventual pairings included, fox spirits, jam magic, one sided pairings included
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-18
Updated: 2015-10-27
Packaged: 2018-02-05 05:34:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 30,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1807210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmileDesu/pseuds/SmileDesu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[27.10.2015 - Double, Final update] ]That's one fox Loki shouldn't have crossed, he realized as he looked at the mirror and found his former pupil Billy Kaplan staring back. Now, if Loki was in Billy's body, there was only one place Billy could be. The only way for them to switch back is to work together, but that is understandably easier said than done, isn't it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There weren't many things Loki wouldn't do. Admittedly, the list was much longer than in the past, but there wasn't _that_ much he wouldn't do when the reward was erasure of his past crimes, the very existence of which compelling him to sin once more. And yes, in case you were wondering, he was well aware of the irony. Still, this _was_ Loki, and Loki had a habit of doing things and achieving his goals Loki's way.  
That day it involved doing battle with a Kitsune spirit.  
  
"Huli Jing!" The fox-like creature protested and squirmed underneath one heavy boot.  
  
"Ah, my apologies," the owner of the leg inside the boot said yet refrained from moving. If anything, he held the creature down with greater strength.  
  
"It's the third time you got it wrong!"  
  
Fourth, in fact, but Loki saw no point in sharing that particular detail.  
"My sincere apologies, elder," the trickster hummed calmly and threw up a large, glowing gem before catching it. "Who better than I to know the import of names and titles, after all?"  
  
"Your lies mean nothing. Unhand me, villain, and return my property!"  
  
"But good spirit, I've laid not a finger on you," Loki retorted as he examined the gem. A light glowed inside and the rock emanated power. This was the treasure the All-Mother sent him to retrieve, and the belief that with this the job was over made him smile.   
He really shouldn't have let his guard down.  
  
"Insolent cur!" The spirit spat as all nine of its tails burst into flames. Loki let out a cry and jumped back, fingers tightly clutching the gem. In his other hand he held his blade, his eyes narrow as he stared at his revived opponent.   
  
"I've defeated you one already, ancient one, I will gladly do so again."  
  
The fox laughed, yet more so than amusement, the sound spoke of determination. The flames summoned danced around them both, seeking revenge on the trickster who wronged their master.   
"I am aware of the difference in power, O fake-Odinson. One defeat is more than enough, but you're a fool if you think you will have the last laugh. I curse thee, trickster! By sunrise, you will be granted a most wonderful gift, one of your black heart's deepest desires-"  
  
"Well, that actually sounds--"  
  
The flames raged ever strongly, singing the edges of his coat and tips of his hair.  
  
"But know this, dog of Asgardia!"  
  
The fire danced around Loki, trapping in a blazing, swirling inferno. When it subsided, it left him surrounded by smoke and soot and all alone with the elder spirit's words to haunt him.   
  
_The thing you long for, for as sure as you grip onto what was mine, will slip out of your grasp and out of your reach..._  
  
"At least make it rhyme, old one," Loki mumbled and looked around him. The forest clearing was empty, the moonlight seeping through the treetops paling in comparison to the glow he held in his fist. He looked down at the stone before placing it inside one of his coat's inner pockets.   
"That should make Mother happy, no doubt."  
  
It wasn't quite that he wasn't concerned. He knew of the Huli Jing's powers and knew the one he angered was old and powerful even among its kind.   
  
_One of my heart's desires_... His fists clenched at his sides. There were several of such wishes, precious, dear and disastrous all. To be given even one, only to have it snatched away...  
  
"...ha!" Loki exclaimed into the darkness before turning tail and leaving. Oh, he _was_ worried. Terrified, even, but there was little he could do against such an unknown threat. He chose instead to count his blessings, relished his victory, and began the long way back home.  
  
-x-  
  
The tunnel was long and dark, sprinkled with stardust over the aurora-built road. There was no resistance as he was hurled through the void, a lone entity made of green glow. It was peaceful, calm, even when he noticed the being coming right at him across the path. It was the most beautiful blue radiance he had ever laid eyes on, pure and bright and almost welcoming. His hand reached out, moved by an unexplained feeling of familiarity and fondness. He could tell even over the distance that the other's eyes were closed, an indication of their blissful unawareness of the situation. If only he could reach, he thought, but there was no time for that. They weren't only passing by each other, they were speeding right _at_ each other, and so inevitably collided.  
  
-x-  
  
A gasp tore through the silence, indicating the dreamer had awoken. Loki blinked up at the ceiling through the darkness before a frown rose to his face. The dream wasn't unpleasant, per-se, but it left him feeling uneasy regardless. Who _was_ that... person? Entity? It was a soul, if Loki knew anything about anything, that much was certain, but whose? Someone he knew? It felt like that, like if he stopped to think about it more he could place--  
A yawn derailed that train of thought. It couldn't possibly have to do with the fox's curse, could it? It made no sense, after all... Feeling sufficiently reassured, he turned on his side to snuggle against the warm body lying in bed next to him.  
_Odin's beard_ , Loki swore under his breath and pushed himself up. The sudden movement made his bedding companion stir with a displeased sound.  
  
"Bee...?" The stranger- _or was he_ \- uttered and half turned around to find an empty mattress as Loki had sprang up and out. The nightstand lamp was turned on, granting Loki with a view of his surroundings. Dim as the light was, Loki still recognized the place and a dull sense of urgency spread through him. And of course, that meant the person he woke up next to was--  
  
"Bee, are you ok?"   
  
The young man sitting up in bed and at least half naked was Teddy Altman, a fine looking, well mannered alien hybrid hailing from both Kree and Skrull dynasties. A super-strong, fast-healing shapeshifter with a tendency for violent bursts of possessiveness towards his boyfriend, a young man answering the name--  
  
"Billy?"  
  
Yes, that sounded about right, Loki thought and even without looking around knew there was no one in the room bar the two of them. Granted, the way Teddy was looking _right at him_ , all worry and some confusion, helped him piece it together.   
  
"Ah, sorry," Loki muttered and kept himself from wincing at the sound of his voice. "I just have to _go_. Why don't you go back to sleep, ok?" The trickster asked in what he hoped wasn't too velvety and sweet a voice. Teddy still looked at him uncertainly, so Loki leaned forward, fully intending to kiss that bit of suspicion away yet all his lips met was the blond's forehead, and by no fault of the changeling's. It seemed to help as Teddy brushed his hand over his side before giving him a light push towards the door.   
  
"Just _go_ already," he urged and Loki nodded before leaving the room. The door closed behind him and he let out a sigh of relief. This sort of thing wasn't good for his heart, he thought and hastily retreated into the bathroom which was thankfully equipped with a lock. The sound the turning key emitted promised privacy, but being alone offered no comfort, it simply meant that now Loki could spare his full attention to the various predicaments at hand. He chose to do so by turning towards the mirror to face his reflection. As he came to expect from the eerie circumstances of his waking and the short conversation with Teddy, it wasn't Loki the trickster found staring back at him. The young man in the mirror whose face was fastly twisting into disapproval at the situation was one Billy Kaplan, a young man whose age stood in contrast to his unimaginable powers, abilities that once upon a time not too long ago made him a target for Loki himself. A former victim, in short, and one of many Loki regretted wronging. Now, there were very many things Loki could and rightly should've thought of, but the first thing he noted was how if he was in Billy's body, there was one place Billy was likeliest to be in the meanwhile.  
  
"Oh, bother."  
  
Whoever's idea of a joke this was, Loki couldn't say he approved.  



	2. Chapter 2

A soft, rhythmic tapping sound echoed through the bathroom, bouncing between the smooth tiles lining the walls and the large mirror the young man was staring impatiently at. Loki Laufeyson, infamous trickster and wayward son of Asgardia, kept tapping his fingers against the mirror that showed not his own reflection but another's, one Billy Kaplan. Loki knew the youth well, having spent a period of time as his teacher of the magical arts. He liked to think they bonded over those months, maybe even reached a certain level of intimacy. Of course, the amount of lies and manipulations involved, both the ones Billy knew of as well as many he did not, seemed to hinder that, yet regardless Loki doubted they were ever close enough for Loki to be comfortable wearing Billy's own skin. He twisted his face into various expressions, some more humorous and degrading than others; Billy's reflection followed suit. He'd have laughed at the silly display if he thought his current position was one to laugh about.   
Once upon a time, another Loki would've relished the endless possibilities the situation offered, and used it to create unimaginable amounts of mischief, chaos and disaster. Contrary to that, this current Loki was one who tried with all his might to back away from being _that_ Loki, and so rather than enjoy himself, he frantically tried to fathom what happened, certain that doing so would also lead him to how he could fix it. Determined and with a set goal in mind, Loki took a deep breath and put his proverbial thinking cap on.  
  
Fact number one - Loki woke up in Billy's body. There was silence in Loki's mind, the kind that accompanied solitude, yet it was unlikely Billy's consciousness ceased to exist. Therefore, Billy must've been elsewhere, with the high likelihood of him occupying Loki's own now-vacant vessel. That sounded about right, Loki concluded with a wince. Oh, the _delight_ it would be for Billy to wake up and face the music, if he hadn't already...  
  
The next order of business was the 'why', as it would also explain the 'how'. The likeliest answer was the event that took place but hours prior, being his run-in with the Huli Jing. Loki wasn't low on enemies and people who'd delight in pulling this sort of prank on him, yet it wasn't anyone's style but his newest adversary. Not too many on the list had the juice to accomplish this, either, and despite Loki emerging victorious after their fight, the fox spirit was more than powerful enough to do this even to Billy. In fact, the boy's powers weren't even a factor, unfortunately. Billy still knew so little about too much, and without knowing he had to defend himself, he stood not a chance. Loki knew that better than anyone as he took good advantage of that fact in the past.   
Billy's face in the mirror twisted into a pained frown at the thought, making Loki look away. He didn't enjoy seeing the handsome features wear that look.   
  
Right, then, back to business. He crossed his arms and brought up a hand to scratch his chin. This being the Huli Jing's revenge was but one piece of the puzzle, and to line up the rest of it, Loki tried to recall the spirit's parting words to him.  
_By sunrise you will be granted a most wonderful gift, one of your black heart's deepest desires_ \--  
Going by the light or lack thereof Loki spied outside the bedroom window earlier, the time was as promised as it was still barely dawn. The rest of the curse's "chapter one" was noticeably harder to crack, though, and made the misplaced trickster quirk a brow. He turned towards the mirror, and true enough Billy looked back with disdain and a touch of skepticism, and still clad only in his shorts. Thank Odin for those, Loki thought briefly before looking back up. The situation was well awkward enough already. Not helping in the least was the implication that being in Billy's body was something Loki desired, and that made very little sense... of course, given that specific phrasing. Being in one's body often meant that to the rest of the world you _were_ that someone, a notion Loki lived through every single day ever since a certain boy had a certain magpie for supper. And if Teddy's behavior was any indication, that was true there as well.   
So, then; would Loki _want_ to be Billy Kaplan, reincarnated son of the Scarlet Witch, budding Avenger, boyfriend to one of the universe's most heritagely-complex individuals, and one of the biggest magical power-houses the Multiverse has ever known? Well, once upon a time, at least, and for a very particular reason at that. Loki stared at Billy in the mirror before looking down at his right hand. One of the perks and subsequent curses to being Billy Kaplan was that you had Billy Kaplan's powers, or did he? Loki slowly inhaled until his chest stuck out and then he closed his eyes. With the exhale of breath he called forth his powers, noting how familiar they felt, how they came naturally to him yet till there was that tinge of discomfort, like something wasn't right. It reminded him of when he had taken Billy's powers and used them in his own child-like form - when powers didn't belong to the vessel channeling them. Seeing as the vessel wasn't his own, it stood to reason that the powers...  
There was no surprise to be found in Loki's expression when he opened his eyes and found the trademark light green dancing at the end of his fingertips rather than the fluorescent-blue of Billy's magic. Loki wasn't surprised, no, it was more apprehension his snarl spoke of.   
"'The thing you long for will slip out of your grasp', was it?" Loki muttered and clenched his fist. He glared at his hand before snorting in disgust at none but himself. For a moment there, a brief instant, he realized he had been _hoping_ \--  
  
His hand slammed into the mirror, fingers spread and palm pressed flush against the smooth surface.   
"Is _this_ your game, Fox?" He hissed, teeth clenched. Even after all this time, after the guilt he actually embraced and welcomed, in the face of the mere possibility of a greater power, he actually _wanted it_ \--  
A glance up at the mirror forced his thoughts and emotions back into focus. There Billy was, looking every bit as frustrated and angry as Loki felt. There was no time for self loathing, Loki concluded and straightened up, hand still on the mirror. He had to set things right, and the sooner, the better.   
His thumb ran under the reflection's eye before he turned away. He refused to let his heroic plan be born in a bathroom with him mostly unclothed, despite his track record. He preferred to at least be decent when he decided how to save the day from the mess he made with his own two hands.  
  
–  
  
It was only fitting that the first obstacle in Loki's path revealed itself as soon as he walked out the door. Every good game offered you a tutorial to start with, didn't they? If only this one was skippable, or the difficulty level was properly tuned. As it was, this felt more like a boss battle.  
  
"Billy?"  
Teddy was there, leaning against the wall and more dressed than he was when last Loki saw him. He had a worried frown on his face and seemed rather wary as well as weary. It took Loki a moment to decide how best to respond, and finally he opted for a small smile he hoped looked apologetic.   
  
"I'm sorry I made you worry."  
  
The small gestures were enough, to Loki's surprise. Teddy smiled back and handed him what Loki realized was a shirt. He then glanced at one of the doors. Loki followed his gaze and realized he could make out sounds coming from behind it. The parents seemed to be waking, Loki noted and took the shirt. He managed barely to slip his hand through a sleeve when Teddy caught that hand and pulled him back to his room. The blond closed the door and held a finger to his lips. The noises grew louder and it was fast becoming apparent that Rebecca and Jeff, mistress and master of the house, were up and about.  
  
"Whew, made it," Teddy muttered and moved away from the door. "You'll have to magic yourself over to your room later, though, we can't risk them seeing you coming out from here."  
  
"Not if we retreated there to begin with," Loki retorted mildly playfully. Teddy pouted back, an expression the trickster wasn't expecting.  
  
"Then I'd have to either climb back through the window or sneak around and I'm _not_ turning into a mouse again; I nearly gave your brother a heart attack the last time."   
A memory Loki wished he could peek into.  
  
"Not if I magicked _you_ over back to _your_ room."  
  
Teddy blinked. "You _could_ , yeah... but then why didn't you _that time_ \--" He demanded, only to realize his conversation partner wasn't listening. Loki looked around the room, hoping to find an excuse to cut the conversation short and make his escape. It would be so easy to trick his way around this or outright spell himself out, an act which _would_ be oh so fitting given their chat, but that would only make Teddy even more worried, and worse still - suspicious. Also, the less he meddled with the guy, the less he'd have to answer for, and oh, would Billy hold him accountable--  
The logical following thought of 'yes, but _how do you do that, Loki?!_ ' was never conjured thanks to a warm hand that pressed against his cheek and tilted his head so he faced Teddy. There was a certain intensity to his gaze, as though he was trying to read the truth off his companion's expression. For a moment, one that felt horrifyingly long, Loki thought that he _could_ , but then that sigh came, deflated and frustrated. Teddy smoothed his other hand over the other's face, brushing away wayward strands of hair so he could better look into those brown eyes. What Loki found staring back at him was concern profound enough to make his chest tighten uncomfortably.   
  
"Talk to me, Bee. What's wrong?" The question was soft yet thundering at the same time. Loki gulped and fought off the urge to run away. Instead, he placed one hand over the one in his hair, an act to which Teddy replied by turning his hand and interlacing their fingers. Loki's other hand rested over Teddy's forearm, and somehow got Teddy's hand from his cheek to his shoulder. Teddy seemed immersed in the gestures, the simple touches which Loki knew were a fundamental part of the communication between Billy and Teddy, and the trickster was grateful for whatever seemed to work as he still wasn't certain what the best course of action would be. Thankfully, he didn't have to try any further as just when he began to actually enjoy the odd game Teddy played with their fingers, the blond spoke again.  
  
"Is it the nightmares again? From the war? ...is that why you won't talk to me?" he added when Loki broke eye contact, squirming slightly. Loki recovered instantly, however, and nodded with a strained smile. Whatever nightmares Billy suffered from, recurring frights bad enough that Teddy knew about them, Loki could inquire about them later, perhaps even from the guy himself. Right then, what mattered was it was the ticket out of that mess Loki needed.  
  
" _Yes_... that, yes. It was that, I--"   
  
Teddy shook his head, hand going back to the other's face from his shoulder while he squeezed the hand he was still holding. "No need to explain, I get it. Don't worry about it." He leaned in; Loki tilted his head, making Teddy kiss his cheek rather than his lips. These awkward instances were becoming a repeating motif between them, but Teddy took it with stride and rested his forehead against the side of his partner's head, hands moving to rest on the small of his back, holding him close but not uncomfortably so. Teddy offered comfort without restricting his movements, a fact Loki found to be curiously endearing in its innocence and purity, an act of good-will and compassion. The boy truly was the loveliest daydream...  
  
"That bad?" Teddy finally asked, voice low and warm over Loki's ear. Oh, did that feel nice, and made it even harder to not pursue when Teddy ultimately pulled away. But what could Loki do but keep up the act?  
  
"...yeah," Loki replied at last with a hand clumsily running over Teddy's chest. "It's just..." He exhaled. "If we do anything, I want to be able to properly _enjoy_ it... you understand, right?"  
  
Teddy understood, and was quite smitten by it, if the look on his face was any indication.  
"Of course I do," Teddy replied in a soft voice and relaxed his hold.  
  
"I'll... get back to my room, then, try and get some sleep. You should, too. See you when I see you?"  
  
Teddy managed a quick peck on his nose before they were too far apart. "You bet. Go on, git. I miss you already."  
  
Loki feigned a laugh before finally escaping to Billy's room. He exhaled heavily, quite exhausted. He knew their relationship was saccharine and witnessed it himself before, but the... _hands-on experience_ was in a league of its own. Telling himself that it was nausea and discomfort rather than jealousy making his insides twist into knots, he opened Billy's closet and searched for something he didn't disapprove of completely. There were many things on his 'to do' list, after all, and now that Teddy was far enough away, it was Loki's chance to make his escape - once he changed out of Billy's pajamas, of course. The sooner the better, too, as he wasn't sure Teddy really bought into his performance, and he wasn't up to trying his luck with the rest of the family if he could help it. Besides, the sooner he got to Billy, the better, hopefully before anyone else did.  
  
–  
  
Loki couldn't say he never thought he'd break into his own apartment, not while meaning it, at least. He's been through worse before and was likely to encounter worse yet in the future, though performing the deed while in Billy's body never seemed to be part of the scenario. Perhaps his ability to still be surprised was something to rejoice over, Loki thought as he undid the final lock and slipped into his apartment through the window. The room was dark even with the sun rising outside, and perhaps that was why Loki felt so uneasy in his own home. Was it his vessel, he wondered, still fatigued and unwelcoming of its current owner... or perhaps it was the sickeningly sweet scent that filled the air, giving him a peculiar yearning for... _confiture_? Curiouser and curiouser, he thought when he realized he stepped in something slippery. Praying to the rest of his pantheon that wasn't blood, Loki reached down and collected a sample on his fingertips. Whatever 'bled' this seemed to be... blueberries, Loki deduced after tasting what appeared to be jam. It wasn't his first choice for makeshift magic supplies, but it's what he had at home if memory served him right, and it worked just as well as anything else going by both past experience and how light emitted from the jam, revealing the pattern drawn in it on the floor and furniture and carpet. The thought he'd have to replace the thing _again_ managed to cross his mind before he recognized the pattern. It was a binding spell, one he passed on to a certain promising pupil of his. Under different circumstances, Loki would no doubt have been proud. Right then, however...?  
  
"Oh, _bother_. _ELSEWH_ \--"  
  
Whips made out of solid light burst out of the sigils, entangling around Loki's body and gagging him. Whoever controlled the spell was smart enough to bind his fingers, too, keeping them apart and stiff. Rather than distraught, Loki chose to be impressed. After all, it _was_ a sight to behold - his own body, lithe, tall figure, illuminated by that lovely fluorescent-blue glow with Billy's magic pouring out of his eyes and fingertips.   
  
"This had _better_ be good," the witch hissed using Loki's voice, making the trickster himself shiver. Well then, this _was_ quite a predicament, wasn't it, Loki thought and would've chuckled if not for nearly suffocating. 'Oh bother' indeed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Deals with an attempted suicide and the inner monologue leading up to it. Specifically the events of Young Avengers (2013) #5

The first thing Billy noticed when he woke up was that the bed was empty. With a soft growl he felt over the mattress, yet much to his dismay not only was there no boyfriend to be found, but the sheets were cold, indicating no one had been there in a while.   
  
"Teddy?" Billy rasped and immediately frowned. He barely sounded like himself... was he coming down with something? He rubbed his throat while looking around the room. There was no sign of Teddy there, so Billy pushed himself up. As soon as he did he realized the room was a different one than where he fell asleep. It wasn't just that he didn't recognize what little he could make out, squinting his eyes in the dark - nothing about the room felt familiar at all, let alone as comfortable as he would expect to feel at home, in a bed he frequented.  
A quick scan of the house showed it was as empty as it was foreign. This was not Billy's house. To make matters worse, he felt as out of sorts in his own body as in the apartment, but not quite in the way a cold or most illnesses would cause him to feel. Did something happen- no, ' _what_ happened' was the right question, he corrected himself and held one hand over his hip while running the other through his hair. The gesture came so naturally to him that it took him a moment to realize how odd his hair felt between his fingers. Thinner, lighter, splitting in all the wrong places, in all the wrong directions, too long or too short, and always in the wrong places...  
_Ah, dammit, that was not the thing to think about, Kaplan!_ he berated inwardly and dragged his hands down his face in self-exasperation - and that's when he froze. Eyes wide, he felt over his face, nose, cheeks, forehead, tracing the hair-line, his ears... Different, everything, it was all--  
"What the--"  
_Wrong_ , he corrected when he realized not only that his voice was _not_ his own, but that it was unnervingly familiar now that he was coherent enough to place it, distorted as it was coming from his own throat. He rushed back to where he found the bathroom, and this time relied not only on the light from the hallway but also the room's own, and that's when he saw _him_ \- Loki. The trickster stared back at him with shock and panic equal to Billy's own, making the witch gulp. He slowly raised a hand and felt something sink inside him when the Loki he saw in the mirror mimicked the movement.   
  
"Oh, God..." That explained it, the unfamiliar place, the different feel of everything, starting from even the different viewpoint from which he saw the world, too tall... He _wasn't_ in _his_ skin, he was in _Loki_ 's.  
  
The silver lining to this revelation was a simple one. If Loki was involved, it was all the easier for Billy to take all his confusion, helplessness and growing panic, and condense them into _rage_. Alright, first thing's first. He'd definitely find out why and how he woke up where he did, but before that, he had to defend himself, set a safe parameter. If he's learned _anything_ from Loki during their time together, it was that the jam Loki had in industrial stock in his kitchen could be put to good use.  
  
–  
  
In all honesty, Billy should've expected the person who ended up breaking into Loki's apartment to be who it was, but as he didn't, it made the encounter all the more jarring.   
"You have _got_ to be kidding me", he growled when he realized who it was, ensnared in his trap - himself, or rather, someone who looked far too much like him for comfort. Maybe even using his actual body.  
  
"...Loki?" Billy asked uncertainly. His frown deepened when his captive failed to reply, letting out mumbles and grunts around a mouthful of light-made links. Billy narrowed his eyes in a thoughtful manner before opting to glare instead when the captive flailed, somehow managing to convey through twitches and moans that - he'd like to be let down now, and - what is _taking_ so _long_?! and - _really_?!  
  
"You do realize I can mute you permanently, right?"  
  
"Only- only you won't," the other gasped once Billy freed his mouth. " _Your_ body and all, are you sure the spell won't backfire and attach to the wrong part of current-me?"  
  
The claim and taunt did little to hasten the process, but finally Billy did release him.   
"I made others, and that one's multi-use, so don't try anything."  
  
"Wouldn't dream of it," Loki replied, his grin meeting an unimpressed glare. The fierce gaze softened shortly into intense scrutiny of the intruder. Being around his long lost twin Tommy for two years did little to prepare Billy for this, as looking at what was likely his own actual self from the outside proved to be too creepy even after everything he's seen and been through. The way that person handled themselves and the unease they left in Billy's gut were all Loki alright, but that only made things worse as if that _was_ Billy's body... well.  
  
"Is this the part where you supposedly explain the situation without actually doing so, right before asking me to trust you?"  
  
"Mayhap I'll ask that first? For a change of pace." Loki grinned, hands in his pockets and a playful air to him. "You know me so well, that's such a rare thing to come by on the first date."  
  
Ignoring the flirt, Billy leaned against the couch's backrest, arms crossed and eyes trained on Loki. "Let's hear it, then, right out of the trickster's mouth. I'm assuming that _is_ your angle? That you _are_...?"  
  
"Loki of Asgard, yes", he replied with a touch of importance and a hint of pride, but it was short-lived. "While we're on the matter of identities, do you mind not wearing that look? It's... _out of character_."  
  
Billy scowled at him, making him take a step back. Ah, yes, there it was, Billy's utter lack of humor when things got rough. It was refreshing in its honesty.   
"Right, then. The short version is that I have gotten on the receiving end of some mischief, and _you_ , my dear, are collateral damage in a certain spirit's vendetta against me."  
  
"Sounds fitting. But what's the long version?"  
  
Loki made a half-hearted-gesture conveying disdain at the request, but as it didn't seem like Billy would yield in the foreseeable future, Loki relented instead.   
"It involves a mission from the All-Mother, a missing Asgardian relic, and a split-tailed fox. I'd be _thrilled_ to discuss this as well as our plan over breakfast-- or we can continue the conversation here," Loki chuckled anxiously when the chains blocked his paths. He followed the sequence of links with his eyes, idly wondering how hard and long it would be to break that spell. He quickly decided against it. Not only would it take time and power he didn't have, but he doubted Billy would sit idly by in the meanwhile. And besides - he didn't come there to make an enemy of him. Loki thus inhaled, exhaled, and having relaxed a bit, finally turned back to Billy.  
"Yes...?"  
  
"Oh, nothing. It's just, you know, this minor thing..." Billy laughed, a humorless sound, before shrugging. "I don't believe a single word you said."  
They stared at each other, the bitterness in Billy's eyes leaving an uncomfortable pressure in Loki's chest.  
"See, if you're _not_ Loki, you've already lied to me once, in which case I'd like to know for sure sooner rather than later."   
  
"And if I _am_ Loki?"  
It was a question that had to be asked, yet one he still regretted as Billy's answer hurt more than he thought it would.  
  
"Then I already have _no_ reason to trust you at all, let alone take your word on anything so easily."  
  
"You want me to prove myself," Loki clarified, and began thinking of ways to do so even before Billy nodded his confirmation. "At least, solve our current identity predicament." He had actually given this matter some thought on the way, and it was quite the predicament indeed. Billy and he were both in equally complicated situations where it was difficult to prove anything about... well, _anything_. On their own, at least. This called for outside intervention.  
"I'll need my phone."  
  
"This one?" Billy pulled the device out of his pocket. He didn't let Loki have it, though, instead holding it away when Loki reached for it. Loki huffed, but relented.   
  
"The security pattern is a diagonal slash from top left to bottom right, and then a stroke up. Look for Verity Willis in the contact book."  
  
Billy did as requested, and then quirked a brow when he saw what other details Loki inputted under Verity's contact entry.  
"'Truth lady'? Isn't this both _convenient_ and _ominous_."  
  
"Put her on speaker, please," Loki asked pleasantly, satisfied by Billy's attempt at a jab, and if nothing else, the reemergence of his infamous cynicism. If he was being stingy, it hopefully meant he was calming down. His appreciation of that fact was was cut short, however, when they reached voice mail.  
  
"Looks like she's screening you."  
  
"Or she's still asleep. Try again."  
  
Billy did, and again, and was at his wits' end when the dull dial tone came to an abrupt stop, replaced by a young woman's voice.   
  
"Do you have _any_ idea what time it is, Loki?!"  
  
Loki's lips split into a grin. He liked Verity quite a bit, but never before did he feel quite so elated to hear her voice.   
"A time in which I offer thanks that you don't mute your phone before bed, my dear Ms. Willis!"  
  
The line went silent for a moment, after which the anger in Verity's voice, while still present, was accompanied by concern and a touch of fear.  
"Who is this?"  
  
"The one and only God of Mischief. Who else would call at these hours?!" Loki's playfulness was met with a blank stare from Billy that held more than a bit of judgement to it. Both looked back at the phone when Verity finally replied.  
  
"What happened to your voice? You sound like... someone else."  
  
"Does that mean you admit that I'm being honest about my identity? Please state it, for the record."  
  
"Record? Loki, what's going on?"   
  
Loki pressed his hands together and against his face. "Verity, I'd be most delighted to explain this entire mess over dinner, hopefully when we can look back at it and laugh, and when I'm physically of legal drinking age again - Odin bless America - but could you please stay on topic, for now?"  
  
"...yes, you're Loki."  
  
"Thank you. Now, Verity Willis, please say hello to--" Loki motioned at Billy in an introductory manner. At the witch's reluctance to cooperate, he added- "You can use your codename. Any name, so long as it's really yours, and that I know you by it."  
  
"...Wiccan," Billy answered eventually, drawing a grumble from the other end of the line.  
  
"Great, now _he_ has _your_ voice-- wait, Wiccan? As in the Young Avengers' Wiccan?!"  
  
"That's the one," Billy confirmed. Under normal circumstances Loki would've relished how bashful and proud Billy looked, but they had bigger fish to fry, and that expression didn't look half as cute on Loki's face anyway, despite it being Billy in there.  
  
"Is he telling the truth, Verity?" The trickster added, eager to get this part over with.  
  
"Ye-yeah. Your voices are mixed up, but neither of you lied to me. You're who you claim to be."   
  
A soft breath of relief left Loki. "Thank you, Verity. We'll let you get back to sleep now."  
  
"That dinner had better be worth it, Loki."  
  
"Have I ever failed you before?" The line went dead. Satisfied, Loki smiled up at Billy who was looking at him funny. "What? I'm a better cook than you'd think."  
  
"Ah ha," Billy sounded largely unimpressed, but there was little Loki could do about that. "Please tell me there's more to it than that."  
  
"What, this?" Loki asked and motioned at the phone, still in Billy's hand. "How, pray-tell, was letting you speak to a woman you've never met and have no reason to trust supposed to make _you_ trust _me_? No, no, my adorable former pupil..."  
  
" _You_ were verifying _me,_ " Billy growled and dragged a hand down his face.  
  
"You never _did_ openly tell me who you were, I simply assumed. Mind, I wouldn't have had a reason to trust you even if you did make a claim regarding your identity - we _are_ in the same position, after all."  
  
"I would be tempted to say it's only fair..." Billy began before giving Loki a pointed look. He was on edge again, the trickster noted. "But now I'm at a disadvantage."  
  
"Not for long, I hope."  
  
"And how do you plan to fix that?"  
  
Loki chuckled softly. "Let's review. For starters, I imagine that if you knew any spell that could help clear things up, you'd have used it by now, meaning you don't. I do, but as you don't trust me, casting the spell is meaningless. Next, there's always your wildcard 'I want' spells, but I'm assuming you're not in-tune enough with my body for that to work. Too easy for it to backfire, I reckon."  
Billy shifted in obvious discomfort, proving Loki's words to be true. Arms crossed, Loki grinned though it lacked any real amusement.  
"I do believe it's time to go about it the old fashioned way!"  
  
"Which is?"  
  
Loki scoffed at the obvious display of distrust before he settled down. "Oh, I'm certain I can find a thing or two only the two of us know about. After all, we have spent so much time together-"  
  
"Not alone, we didn't," Billy corrected. "Most of the time we trained on the ship, not much privacy there, and when we were away, America hounded you like a shadow, refusing to give you time alone with me... of course, you should've known that if you were telling me the truth."  
  
"I do, quite well, yes. Yet still I can think of... hm, twice we were together with nary a soul in sight? Yes, that sounds right..."  
  
"Christ--" Billy swore and took two steps away in annoyance. "You knew what you'd say before you even broke in! How all of this would play out, even!"  
  
"No later than three blocks away, I'd say."  
  
Billy threw his hands up in resignation. "That much about you is Loki-like, I'll give you that." He ran his hands through his hair before exhaling heavily. Mildly deflated, he turned back to Loki, but rather than defeat Loki noticed something else that unnerved him.  
"Let's hear it, then, this magical moment we supposedly shared that's going to miraculously make me believe you. I'm warning you, though-" He trailed off to let the fact the chains of light rematerialized make even more of an impression. "You only get one shot at it."  
  
Loki eyed the chains before looking directly into Billy's eyes. "That's all I need. I'll thus warn _you_ \- you might want to sit down."  
  
Billy settled against the couch's backrest again, arms crossed. Loki nodded - this was as good as he was going to get. He scratched the corners of his mouth with both thumb and forefinger before holding his hands together. Then he held them at shoulder height, his shoulders tense.   
"Right. Let me tell you a tale-"  
  
"Loki--"  
  
"The details and mood are important. Besides, I only have one chance, let me do it my way. Now, where was I- ah, yes.  
"It was in the Park of Central where our heroes' ship crash-landed, surrounded by New York's finest parental-units-turned-Goo-Monsters. The dashing young vagabonds were facing an endless, unwinnable fight... until lo! Young Loki, cunning and fast-witted, spun a most glorified lie-" Loki pointed at Billy, arm outstretched. "Kill Master Kaplan, and it all goes away."  
  
Loki recalled the way Billy had looked back then, like an animal backed into a corner, terrified and lost. The distant memory of it still shone deep in Billy's eyes and while his expression betrayed but a pursing of his lips, his shoulders were tense and his fingers over his arms tugged at the fabric of his sleeves. Back then, Loki made the declaration with a smile, yet now he couldn't feign playfulness, not even the least amount of jest. The worst part of it all was that this was hardly enough to prove Loki's identity, and so reluctantly he went on.  
  
"With these two as his options, either giving Loki his powers... or death at his lover's hand-"   
Billy's eyes widened. That particular part the child Loki whispered in his ear, unknown to the rest of them. If left the impact Loki desired, even if the nausea it brought was overwhelming.   
"--the witch obliged, giving Loki his powers. The boy then proceeded to do what comes naturally to a Loki - he ran away."  
  
Billy's breathing was noticeably heavier and labored. Loki wished he didn't have to do this, truly. And yet...  
  
"As later plot twists would reveal, Loki departed to a safe location as the spell to save them required time to prepare and concentration, both unaffordable luxuries down on the battlefield.   
"Yet alas, the party knew not of his plan. And while most of them fought a losing battle that would cost them not only their lives but their eternal souls, young Billy Kaplan stood back, watching it all unfold. Powerless, _useless_... hopeless. Certain it was all his fault, he recalled the convenient solution Loki cooked up, and with neither side in the conflict e'er the wiser, he snuck back into the Kree ship, made his way to the armory, and..."  
  
He brought two fingers to his chin, and finally Billy looked away, eyes shut tightly before he covered his face with both hands. Loki lowered his hand and silently watched him, uncertain as to how to proceed. It wasn't the best of times for Billy to recall, but how else was he supposed to earn his trust... of course, assuming that Billy believed him--  
  
"And?!" Billy demanded despite the fact his face was still mostly covered. Loki gulped, hesitating to respond.  
"And-- what happened next?!" The witch went on, eyes wide and set on Loki while his hands dropped to the couch. Loki winced and dropped the charade; they were past the time for theatrics.  
  
"I arrived in the nick of time, pushing your hand away just..." He gulped and forced the words out of his mouth. "Just as you pulled the trigger."  
  
Billy's eyes closed and he let his head hang low. Loki suddenly found his lips glued together, his tongue numb and useless, and his feet stuck to the floor. He remembered how, back then, with his hand on Billy's shoulder and his mouth conjuring double-meaning reassurances, he both congratulated himself on a job well done as well as battled his guilt. Now, there was one thing warding off emptiness - it was self-loathing. It made the words stick in his mouth- no, he wanted to say something, _needed_ to say it, it was on the tip of his tongue, those words he never said but should've--  
  
"I believe you."   
  
Whatever it was, Loki swallowed it around a startled gulp. "I beg your pardon?"  He gasped, taken by surprise by the statement. Billy pulled his hair back and slowly dragged his hands even further so his hair sprung forward gradually, awkwardly. He focused on his breaths and after a moment nodded without looking at Loki.   
  
"I never thought I'd say this, but I believe you. The ship's cameras were down because of the crash, you probably never shared because it's too good a bargaining chip, and I--" Billy shrugged before lowering his hands to his sides. " _I_ never told anyone, so--"  
  
" _No_ one?" Loki repeated incredulously, finding it impossible to believe. "Not even Te-"  
The look Billy finally graced him with, one oh so tired, made Loki swallow the rest of the question, and give up on that specific pursuit.  
" _No_ one. Gotcha."  
  
Billy nodded slowly, eyes downcast. Loki watched him for a while until he was no longer able to stand the forlorn silence.   
"While we're on the matter of not telling people things, did you, perchance, inform anyone of our situation? Say, oh, dearest Stephen Strange, or perhaps your mother from another life?"  
  
Billy wiped the corner of his eye with a finger before shaking his head. "It somehow seemed like a bad idea to make contact with anyone while in your body. It doesn't exactly instill confidence and trust."  
  
Loki hummed thoughtfully before nodding, deciding to play along. "So it seems, yes."  
  
"You're here _now_ , though," Billy added then, much to Loki's disdain. "If we have us both, then-"  
  
"We're not doing it," The Demigod concluded, arms crossed. Billy rolled his eyes.  
  
"This isn't the time for your wounded pride-"  
  
"It's not _only_ that," Loki claimed before holding a hand over his chest. He paused when he felt Billy's heartbeat, the way the blood flowed through the boy's vessel, so different from his own yet just the same. "You feel it too, don't you? This tugging in the middle of your chest. It's pulling you out, reminding you it's not where you belong..." He let Billy mimic the gesture, and knew his point was made.   
"But it's _faint_. _Fragile_. The one behind this was no pushover. They knew what they were doing and they did this for a reason. Who knows what might happen if we involve other people, especially the Witch, whose lack of finesse is second only to yours." He promptly ignored the disgruntled look Billy gave him at the double insult to both him and Wanda.  
"It might weaken the link further... or worse."  
  
"You mean we could stay stuck like this," Billy concluded and pursed his lips. Loki nodded, seeming quite aloof.  
  
"It's the _worst_ case scenario, but it's still possible, yes. I suppose I should find comfort in the family I'll become a part of, and your partner. He _is_ as lovely as they come, after all..." He actually welcomed the glare Billy sent his way. He needed him focused and driven; anger tended to do that.   
  
"Meanwhile _I_ 'm stuck being _you_ ," Billy spat back. "This wouldn't be the first time you claimed to help but really didn't. How do I know this wasn't your plan all along?!"  
  
Loki nodded. These were all good points, and ones Billy in another time and place wouldn't have reached. It made the trickster smile sadly.  
"Look at you. You really are growing up."  
  
"You made me."  
  
Another slow nod followed, but that was all Loki felt they could afford. As much as he deserved every last bit of Billy's spite and resentment, that was neither the time nor the place.  
"I could've left you here and watched people reject your claims about who you really were while I lived your life, enjoying so many things I never had. But here I am, trying to switch us back. And you know why? _Because_ -" he stressed, thankfully silencing any bitter interjections Billy wanted to make. He stared at him then, Loki's eyes filled with all the pride and dignity a Loki could muster.  
"Because being Loki is _my_ cross to bear. Your story goes down a different path."  
  
The air was heavy with the silence that followed. Billy looked from one item in the room to another, all the while Loki's eyes were set on his face, trying to decipher what was going on in his mind, an act that was far too difficult given that Billy was currently wearing Loki's own features. Of course, Loki had nothing if not a poker face. Finally the witch snorted, a gasped out sound.  
  
"A path that means trusting you."  
  
"Rock bottom makes for a sturdy foundation."  
  
"...I know that meme."  
  
Loki smiled fondly at the retort before taking an experimental step outside the magical circle of jam. There was no retribution, no punishment. They had a deal.  
  
"Hm. It appears we'll have to deal with you jamming up my apartment later. Why don't we discuss the plan over breakfast? It _is_ the most important meal of the day, and we both would need our strength before long. Worry not, I promise no bacon will be consumed by either your spirit or body."  
  
Billy stayed behind while Loki pranced into the kitchen, feeling obviously comfortable at his own home despite not quite being himself. Teaming up with Loki was not something he was eager to do, but as always, the trickster's words rang so very true... he clutched a handful of shirt over his chest before turning to look at Loki who was muttering something about the apron not fitting quite right with his current body. Loki Laufeyson, his once again partner in crime.  
  
"Oh, bother..." Billy muttered before joining Loki in the kitchen, concluding he should at least hear what he had to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The meme](http://imgur.com/gallery/paob8)


	4. Chapter 4

Imps. Of all the creatures in the nine realms they could come up against, it had to be _imps_. Scaly, slimy... _fire breathing_ _imps_.  
  
"DUCK!" Loki cried out, letting Billy dodge just in time as one of the creatures spat fire at him. The mage retaliated with lightning, taking one down only to have two take its place, and what's worse - now they were angry. Energy gathered at Billy's clenched fists, leaving Loki with mere seconds to pick a course of action. More imps were coming, nothing Billy alone couldn't handle even given their switcharoo, but the question was - should he? Should Loki let Billy cut loose, and no doubt draw the attention of every other magical creature nearby?  
No. That was such a bad idea it was not even an option. Then again, this _was_ Billy Kaplan there, despite the Loki-package, which meant Loki had to intervene - and fast.  
  
"Billy!" he called, drawing Billy's attention. It let the witch see the item Loki held in his hand, so when the smoke bomb was thrown, he knew to cover his face, unlike his two assailants who flew back, shrieking.   
  
"Come on!" The trickster grabbed Billy's wrist and pulled him away. They broke into a sprint, Billy following Loki closely. Loki ducked suddenly and Billy stumbled to follow. They hid under a fallen trunk and Loki rolled on top of Billy, one hand over Billy's mouth while the other gripped tightly onto one of his invisibility artifacts, a valuable artifact he picked up before they left home. Overhead they heard the imps fly past, and only a while later did Loki roll off, revealing the both of them and letting Billy breathe again.  
  
"I _hate_ imps," Loki growled. Billy chuckled breathlessly in response.  
  
"Well, they didn't seem too fond of us, either. How did you get past them the last time, again?"  
  
"I didn't go around picking fights," Loki berated and was all the more frustrated when Billy didn't seem sorry in the least.  
  
"We don't have time to sneak around like this."  
  
"Ah, but fighting the entire forest is time-efficient, I take it? Billy, get a hold of yourself."  
  
Billy growled, but he couldn't argue with the facts. The fight cost them time, forced them to take a detour, and now they would have to be all the more careful when traveling - which meant, no doubt, moving at a slower pace.  
  
"Remind me again why we can't just teleport over?"  
  
Loki sighed. "Must I _really_ repeat what I said this morning, Billy?"  
  
"Humor me."  
  
–  
  
The plan, in its core, was simple. They were to teleport close to the forest where the Huli Jing resided and make their way in on foot. Once there, they would confront the spirit and get back to their own bodies. Loki had made Billy promise to keep his questions to the end, all the while making breakfast. As promised, there was no bacon involved. Loki ran back and forth in his kitchen, and before long Billy had several side dishes, toasts, a pile of pancakes and an omelet placed before him.  
  
"Apple or orange?" Loki asked, making Billy look up to find him holding two cartons of juice. He wasn't in the mood to play house so he left Loki hanging until the trickster finally shrugged.  
"Both, then. Both is good," he concluded and poured both some orange juice before sitting down, the cartons left on the table.   
"Alright. As promised-" he hummed and stuffed his plate. "You may ask me questions now."  
  
Billy pursed his lips while he prioritized his inquiries. Finally he decided on one to start with.  
"Why can't we teleport inside the forest?"  
  
A naive question, but one that had to be asked, for sure.   
"It's not your average forest. Its mystical properties are quite unique even among other similar locations. There's a reason why it's filled to the brim with spirits, and it's not the ocean view. The good news is that when we're there, we'll get quite the lovely boost, all the more helpful seeing how neither of us are in top-shape right now. However--"  
  
"That will only apply once we're already there, so it can't help us on the way in, and in fact means there'll be that much more interference to work our way through ,unless we go in on foot. Gotcha."   
  
Loki smiled briefly. "Has anyone told you how refreshing it is to have you actually know a thing or two about magic?"  
  
"If you're intending to pat yourself on the back, don't. It's basic fantasy-book material and I've read my fair share of those."  
  
"My statement still holds, regardless of the knowledge's origin," Loki insisted before taking a bite out of his toast. "Now, it merits a mention, how the place _is_ crawling with spirits, monsters and other magical creatures, ones who will already be aware on some level of our presence even without us broadcasting it by using magic."  
  
"Speaking of which, what _are_ we going to face?" Billy asked, forearms on the table, pushing his still empty plate away. Loki applied some Nutella on another slice of toast before answering.  
  
"Oh, all sorts of wonderful creatures. There's the Huli Jing, of course, pixies, wood nymphs, I believe an ogre resides in one of the caves... oh..." He paused in order to frown. "And _imps_."   
  
Billy quirked a brow. "We don't like imps, I take it."  
  
"We _hate_ imps about as much as they hate anything that isn't themselves, and that includes other imps. They're rotten, vicious creatures who thrive on mayhem and suffering and are particularly fond of mischief of the hazardous variety."  
  
"Funny... that sounds a lot like _you_."  
  
There was something poetic about having that statement be said in Loki's own voice, but Loki couldn't be bothered with placing exactly what it was. Instead he tried not to be too fazed by Billy's ever warranted bitterness.   
"Yes, well... don't expect _them_ to magically grow a conscience."  
  
"Don't expect me to be grateful for yours."  
  
That bite of omelet didn't go down as smoothly as it should've. Loki stared at Billy, who, having said what he wanted, was now looking elsewhere, anywhere but at Loki. It rang oddly familiar, that statement, reminding Loki of something someone had told him before. What was it, now... about him not being _allowed_ to change? Either way, that hurt more than he cared to admit, yet he wasn't allowed to dwell on it for long.  
  
"So... this Huli Jing?" Billy started, pulling the conversation back on track. "It's a fox spirit, right? How many tails?" he asked, his own glass of juice finally at hand, something for him to toy with and focus on.  
  
"Nine," Loki replied simply, making Billy groan.  
  
"Of _course_ it has all nine tails. Of _course_."  
  
Loki let out a small, weak snicker at that, only to blink at the look Billy gave him next.  
  
"Last question--"  
  
Loki held his fork up, stopping Billy mid-sentence. "Only if you eat something afterward. And drink your juice. You'll need your strength."  
  
Billy took a sip from his juice to display his acceptance of the terms. Loki nodded his approval.  
  
"Ask away."  
  
"Once we get through the magical forest of magical creatures and find the Huli Jing... what _is_ your plan? How are we going to get it to switch us back?"  
  
Loki wiped his mouth with a napkin and poured some more juice into his glass.   
"Hopefully, by the time we get there, it would be satisfied with my punishment. If not that, hopefully it will agree to spare _you_."  
  
"And here I thought you sought me out because you liked me."  
  
"I _do_ require your help if I've any hope to succeed in this, even simply making it there in one piece."  
  
Billy took a moment to ponder that before he pinched the bridge of his nose. "So, basically, the plan is us doing a lot of _hoping_ , did I get that right?"  
  
"Quite so, yes," Loki confirmed before looking down, a thoughtful frown on his face. "Let us especially hope that when I get down on all fours and bow so low I can kiss the ground..." he trailed off, not trusting his voice. He looked up, catching Billy's gaze, and forced himself to speak again.  
"I'll be forgiven."  
  
Oblivious to the possibility Loki wasn't quite talking about the fox, Billy palmed his face with a groan.  
"Your plan is _apologizing_?!"  
  
In an attempt to ignore the jolt of pain, Loki drank some more juice. "I can't give back what I took, and even if I could, it wouldn't help since it's not about that - I humiliated it. The only way to even begin making up for that is to lower myself as much as I can."  
  
Neither said much for a while until finally Billy lowered his hands, a despaired look on his face.  
"You realize, of course, that means we're utterly _screwed_ , right?"  
  
"Quite," Loki confirmed and began piling food on Billy's plate. "Now keep your promise and eat something."  
  
Billy was beyond arguing, if only because he grew tired of it. He reached for his fork and consumed his meal in silence.  
  
–  
  
Splitting from Billy was at once both the best and worst thing Loki could've done. At the very least, Billy wasn't there to draw attention to them, and at best - he was actively drawing attention away from Loki with his recklessness and short temper, letting the trickster roam free. And yet it was that distance that also posed a problem - Loki couldn't keep Billy safe, couldn't spare him several precious mistakes that might cost them both dearly. Deciding it was therefore best he finished up with his errands as soon as possible, Loki picked up the pace. He collected berries he knew were edible and as much firewood as he could carry without relying on magic for help - that would draw unwanted attention, and the less he had of that, the better. He then made his way to the meeting point - it was a cave at the bottom of the mountain-side, one easy to find as it was oozing magical energy so they would both be able to arrive there even when apart. The even more inviting aspect of it was that most spirits inhabiting the forest wouldn't come near it if they could help it. They'd be safe there for a while, that is, unless Billy was already captured - or worse. Well, only one way to find out, Loki thought and made his way inside.   
It wasn't even several feet into the cave before the tunnel curled, depriving the visitor from the light of the sun, and yet it was hardly dark. Decorating the cave's walls were numerous crystals, each emanating light in a different color. The magical aura in the air was almost tangible, leaving Loki momentarily lightheaded. When he recovered, having grown used to it, he let himself smile as he felt Billy's presence not too far ahead. The way the boy's aura felt almost at home, mixed with the pure energies that filled the air, didn't pass by Loki, but he decided to ponder that at a later date, and instead embraced the relief he felt when he finally found the other. Billy seemed tired and grumpy, but otherwise unharmed. He was sitting on the ground with his back to a large rock. Before him was a small fire, happily eating away at some kindlings.   
  
"I can't help but notice the absence of smoke," Loki said and noted the lack of surprise Billy displayed at the sound of his voice. Hm, he must've felt him approach; good.   
  
"It's just a small ventilation spell. What's the harm? You said they can't find us here."  
  
"I said they'd have a hard time doing so, there's a difference," he countered and handed Billy his share of the meal. He then took his place on another rock, eyes set on the crystals littering the ceiling. "This cave is a focal point for all the magical energies in the forest. It will be difficult to find us here with all this interference, plus the locals don't come near as they consider it sacred - but I'd rather not push our luck." He looked back down at Billy who turned away just then, proof he was listening up to that moment. He was nibbling on the berries Loki brought and- oh- stained his shirt.  
  
"Whoops."  
  
"I _love_ that shirt!"  
  
"And I'd be _happy_ to clean it, onceI'm _allowed to cast spells again_."  
  
Loki rolled his eyes at Billy's tendency to subjectively heed his warnings before biting angrily into a berry of his own. He wasn't keen on leaving things on that note, however.  
"Not entirely unrelated, the fire itself seems suspiciously unmagical," he pondered out loud and reached for the flints left not too far from the fire. "Am I in the presence of a boy-scout?"  
He wasn't really expecting a reply. Billy so far remained comfortable in his disdain for his companion, so when he actually answered, albeit after a while, Loki almost choked on a berry.   
  
"Dad taught me. We used to go camping a lot until Daniel was old enough to join us. Turns out he's allergic to half the things in the forest, so it was either leaving him behind every time, or stop going."  
  
Loki held his breath until Billy was done, fearing that even the smallest of gasps would shatter the moment. As it was, Billy said all he had to say before he fell silent, leaving the air the calmest it's been since they met that morning. Perhaps that was why Loki felt the need to- most likely- ruin it.  
"How _are_ things with your parents?"  
  
The way Billy looked at him wasn't quite hostile, but it spoke of suspicion and distrust. "Why? Are there any more creatures from the void who'd like to _possess_ them?"   
  
Loki gulped. "Not... to the best of my knowledge, no."  
  
Billy looked at him skeptically before leaning his head back against the rock, eyes closed. For a moment Loki was certain Billy would remain silent, only to be surprised again when again Billy humored him by replying.  
  
"We're... fine, I guess. I mean, It's not like it was _our_ fault things went awry before." He trailed off before chuckling, face twisting with bitterness that made his smile all the more unnerving. "I can't exactly tell _them_ that, so they're still walking on eggshells around me, trying to avoid repeating mistakes they never actually made, without even knowing what they were. I keep telling them we were away because of superhero stuff, that the Avengers were involved-- and it's not even a lie! But it's like..." He waved a hand about, trying to grasp the right words before frowning. "Like they remember just enough to know I'm not being completely honest with them."  
  
Loki nodded slowly. This, too, was on him, he knew, and felt the need to do _something_ about it, now that Billy was actually talking to him.  
"I'm rather certain you can tell them the truth now," he finally said, voice soft yet steady. "Mother is gone and so is her influence. If you tell them the truth, your voice will reach them this time."   
He wasn't quite expecting a snort in response, though it made him consider what _was_ he expecting. Surely gratitude was too much to ask for, all things considered.  
  
" _Rather certain_ that's the _last_ thing I want to do."  
  
"Why?" Loki asked, confused. Billy pinched the bridge of his nose before dragging his hand down his face. When he spoke again there was no anger or even bitterness on his face or in his voice, only sadness and pain.  
  
"It doesn't matter that they were being controlled, or that they acted against their will. They're still the pawns used. Times like this, whatever happened, regardless of what say you had in it..." He looked down at his hands before clenching them into fists. "It's on you."  
  
Loki had a good moment of silence to ponder what exactly Billy was talking about. If he wanted to play ignorant and detached, he could pretend the example used was Wanda and the ways in which Dr. Doom allegedly toyed with her. He knew better, of course, and while that might've been a part of it as the Scarlet Witch still insisted on taking responsibility despite Doom's potential involvement, Billy was talking about himself. While not unthinkable that some other events in his past shaped that opinion, one thing was certain - he was talking about everything Loki made him do, and the knowledge Billy refused to lay the blame in its entirety on him was at once both curiously charming as well as enough to make Loki's stomach turn to knots. The original sentiment itself was easy enough for Loki to relate to, and he looked down at the hands he kept rubbing together as though to get something off them.   
So caught up in his thoughts he was, that when Billy spoke again, Loki was caught by surprise.  
  
"Telling yourself it wasn't your fault might help you sleep better _some_ nights, but other times? It actually makes it worse. If I can help it, I'd rather not put them through it."  
  
For his own sake as well, Loki knew, but kept that to himself, instead letting out a small 'I see'. There was little else for him to say on the matter, and for a brief moment he considered staying quiet, yet as always, a Loki does as Loki do, and where Billy was concerned, Loki couldn't seem to keep his foot out of his mouth.   
"What about Teddy? Or are you going to keep the whole thing a secret from him, too?"  
  
Billy quirked a brow before pointing at his face, not truly his own at the moment. "About _this_? Or...?"   
  
Loki shook his head before sighing. He forced himself to fight off the annoyance, knowing Billy wasn't doing this on purpose, and took a stabilizing breath. This _was_ a sensitive topic, after all, and he wanted to be in control of himself when he brought it up, not for the first time that day.  
"About that thing only you and I know of," he explained softly. It took him a moment, but Billy caught on, judging by the distraught look on his face right before he looked away. Loki wasn't about to let up so easily, though.  
"Oh, and that _other_ thing, _also_ known to Kate-" He counted off one finger. "Noh-Varr-" Another. "America-" Third.  
  
" _Enough_."  
  
The fourth finger was extended but the name associated with it was left unsaid. Loki withdraw both hands and watched Billy in silence, watching how the gears were shifting in his head, and oh, the pained look on his face.  
  
"He deserves to know, Billy."  
  
"What do _you_ care?!" Billy barked back. A legitimate concern for sure, one Loki certainly wasn't going to argue with.  
  
"One hypothesis would have it that as I'm in _your_ body and _you_ care--"  
  
Billy held his hand up; Loki fell silent. Billy then muttered something about how he couldn't believe Loki actually said that, after which he properly answered the original question.  
  
"When exactly am I supposed to bring it up? What, over dinner, when he passes me the salt? When we're out on a date just as he hands me something he won at the booths? Oh, no no no, _I know_ \- pillow talk! 'Gee, Ted, the sex was _great_! Oh, by the way, I _tried to kill myself! Twice!_ '" His voice, already unsteady, cracked and finally broke. He looked away, teeth clenched. Loki on his part remained silent, not trusting himself to not make matters worse. Eventually Billy lowered his head, eyes set on the fire dancing before him.  
"It's not exactly something I can bring up out of the blue..."  
  
"And yet, you must," Loki countered softly, finally feeling there was room for him to speak. "This is hardly anything a build-up for will simply happen on its own, Billy. You must make one yourself."  
  
"Or...?"   
  
The lone word, barely a syllable, made Loki frown. This was it.  
  
"Or, inevitably someone will find out and use it against you and the man you care so much for."  
Billy winced, but said nothing, so Loki continued. "Billy, when you two are in-sync, you're unbreakable, and not _only_ because your powers are at their peak whenever he's involved. Yours is the kind of love and trust that can only be found in the tales of old... well, and Disney." He got no response to that. A disappointment, yet one he couldn't dwell on. "The flip side of this is that you're all the more vulnerable when things aren't as they should be. I do believe I have provided more than enough proof to that effect, yes?"  
  
Billy didn't quite glare, yet still it was oddly reassuring to see he could be bothered with giving Loki a dirty look.  
  
"You want further proof? Look at what our beloved _David_ did once he found out, and _he_ was almost a _friend_."  
  
At the mention of Prodigy, Billy's face twisted into something not quite unreadable that spoke at the very least of discomfort and unease. He kept quiet, though, so Loki pressed on, refusing to let this chance go now that he's pushed this far.  
"It _will_ get out, Billy, and unless it's on _your_ terms, it _will_ be used by the most unsavory people."  
  
"People like _you_?" Billy spat back. Loki had the distinct feeling this was Billy's attempt to fight the situation at large rather than the person standing before him, yet it changed little that few were as worthy targets as Loki. He couldn't quite deny the validity of the accusation either way, even if it was meant more as an insult. He smiled, the gesture weak and sad.  
  
"Maybe even me, who knows. The night is still young, as they say."  
  
Billy shook his head, despair written over his features. It was a weird expression to see on Loki's face, and Loki himself watched it until Billy looked away, at which point Loki lowered his gaze. Would this even make a difference, he wondered; granted, given just how much Billy liked him, he may have just ensured the opposite of what he attempted to achieve. Typical Loki, he thought and chewed on a berry, unable to enjoy its sweet-sour flavor. He had half a mind to get some rest after this, but the sound of a heavy sigh made him look at Billy. The teen was staring at what remained of his own berries as though they were to blame for everything, but ultimately he looked at Loki, a small spark of determination in his eyes,  
  
"My turn."  
  
"...pardon?" Loki blinked. It seemed as though that wasn't what Billy intended to say, judging by how frustrated he looked, but he forced himself to go on regardless.  
  
"You asked your questions and I answered, Lord knows why. Now it's my turn to ask."  
  
"Fair enough," Loki agreed. "Ask away."  
  
He was met with a silence that stretched, making Loki gulp. He was quite certain he wasn't to like whatever it was Billy was struggling with, and he was far from wrong. He rarely was when it came to Billy, it seemed.  
  
"At first, you said that... that my _death_... would fix everything."  
  
Loki straightened up and hoped it didn't show, just how tense he became at that intro line. Still, that was one statement he couldn't simply let slide.  
"And then I told you I lied about that, yes."  
  
Billy nodded with a snort. "That you did... but, see, that's what gets me - it doesn't make any sense," he stated around a snarl. "We were having our asses handed to us. We were _losing_ , and you _almost_ didn't have your way."  
  
"Almost!" Loki pointed out and forced himself to sound as boastful as he could. Billy didn't seem impressed.  
  
"It was a close call, the kind that so easily goes wrong, which got me thinking just how _so_ unlike Loki it is, to go into any situation without-" His breath caught in his throat, but he still managed to hiss - "a _plan B_. So which was the lie, then..."  
  
"What's the point of this, Billy?" Loki demanded without a shred of playfulness or amusement. It was apparent Billy was thrown off balance by the interjection, but it was for the better as it bought Loki the second he needed to find his words. "You've obviously made up your mind on the matter, and we both know my chances of changing it aren't exactly impressive. Besides, what's done is done, does it truly matter what the lie was?"  
  
"It does to me."   
  
Loki stared at Billy for as long as the other looked back. The boy was desperate and lost, and Loki was certain he regretted asking, but as it was...  
"Very well," he said at last and chewed on his final berry before leaning forward. "I'll give you an answer.  
"Following the story as it played out, the lie is as we know it - Master Kaplan exiting stage left would bring no relief to anyone. With that ruled out as an option, our heroes triumphed over obstacles and arrived at an ending where all but the villain got their happily-ever-afters - but you knew that, seeing as we're in the middle of the awkward sequel." Following the short monologue, Loki snatched Billy's remaining berries before he stood up and began pacing through the cavity. "But the tale could've gone differently, for sure; after all, I could've just as easily lied about lying." He let his eyes meet Billy's before he spun about, arms outstretched.   
"Imagine, then, a scenario such as this! There is and always has been a 'panic button', a simple solution that could release us all from the burden of Mother dearest! But _ah_ -" He turned to Billy, one finger held up. " _None_ would hear of it! Perish the thought, they would surely say, and refuse to be swayed. As befitting a group of young Midgardian heroes, they would choose the hardest path for the sake of a moral highground, afraid of their conscience. They would fight on, struggle, crawl and claw their way through, come hell or high water, and they would come out triumphant. Now, I _may_ be mistaken, but doesn't that sound strikingly familiar to what actually happened?"  
  
Billy opened his mouth, no doubt to protest and argue, but Loki was having none of that.  
  
"NOW!" he practically yelled, refusing to let Billy manage a single word. Billy withdrew reluctantly, but his displeasure soon gave way to confusion at the sad look that crossed Loki's face. "About that... _what if_ you're _insisting_ on holding onto..." He crouched on the ground, eyes on the fire before he looked back at Billy. The body might've been the trickster's, but the helpless look that had Loki's chest tighten was all Billy. Loki sighed softly.  
"To say it would've brought an end to the story...? _A_ story, yes, for sure - a very specific one, the protagonist of which would no longer be around to see the aftermath of his tale. He would never have seen the siblings who outlived their brother, or the two mourning parents who never _really_ knew why they lost their first born, or the two more wondering why they lost their second. So many laying yet another friend to rest, so soon after they lost the first... and of course-- well, you didn't quite tie the knot yet, but there would be a _widower_ left in your wake... not quite a _happy_ ending, now is it?"  
  
His brows furrowed when Billy looked away. Judging by the way his lower lip quivered, he was on the verge of tears. Small wonder in light of their weighted conversation, but what did come as a surprise to both parties was how Loki reached for Billy's face, hand cupping his chin and gently tilting his head up. What Loki had to say next, he wanted to have Billy look at him when he said it. It might've been the hardest thing he's done yet, staring at his own face like that, but he knew it was really Billy in there - and Billy needed to hear this.   
  
"Billy, it's a _good_ thing you're alive. Stop trying to find excuses to think otherwise."  
  
Billy's visible shock at the first statement gave way to an almost embarrassed aversion of his gaze when Loki voiced that demand. Perhaps it was that loss of eye contact that made Loki brush his fingers over the other's cheek before withdrawing his hand.   
For a good while neither said anything while they kept looking away, but the awkward, heavy silence was one they ultimately couldn't afford for long. Finding comfort in how Billy stopped arguing, Loki nodded and pushed himself up.  
  
"We'll head out after we've gotten some rest," he stated before crouching by the small pond at the edge of the cave, its clear water reflecting the light of the stones in the walls. He drank and washed his face, never once letting Billy out of his sight. The witch was tugging at the newfound stain on Loki's shirt and seemed peculiarly guilty. Loki thought little of it while he found himself a nice rock to curl up on, not too far from the flame. As soon as he got somewhat comfortable, Billy spoke again, a hesitant, clumsy whisper.  
  
"I'm sorry about your shirt," he said, but Loki chose not to reply, pretending to have already fallen asleep. While Billy went about his business, getting ready to rest himself, the trickster contemplated their most recent conversation, all the while watching his companion who remained unaware of the attention. Loki wondered silently if he didn't make matters worse for them by pacifying Billy, knowing just how powerful the boy could be while angry, and how useful that anger could be given what they were soon to face.  
_Oh, bother,_ he thought, but found he didn't really mean it. Billy did need to hear those words, and Loki? He _wanted_ to say them more than he ever cared to admit. Feeling thus oddly satisfied, Loki waited until Billy settled down and finally let himself drift off to sleep too.


	5. Chapter 5

It was Loki's birthday. He knew as much thanks to the large 'happy birthday' signs that hung from one treetop to the other, floating above the Avengers mansion's garden. As befitting the occasion, the place was cheerfully decorated with balloons and massive dolls and at least two bouncy castles. Large tables covered with white tablecloths offered a generous variety of refreshments to the numerous guests who attended, most of whom were well known heroes and cultural icons. Loki, a bundle of energy and excitement on his eighth birthday, ran back and forth between the piles of presents with Cassie Lang always at his side, daughter of Ant-Man and one of his very best friends in the whole wide world. Depending on her mood, the girl would either encourage him to open the presents early or wait, but they ran away before he could ever decide, giggling at the mere naughty possibility of what they almost did. Other children played with them, but they came and went. Not Cassie, though. Her, Loki never let out of his sight. It felt as though something terrible would happen if he did.  
Being granted temporary respite from the duties of saving the world, their families were there as well, and the sight of his mother, clad in her trademark red and pinkish garbs, put his mind at ease. Having noticed them, she motioned him over and he obliged, Cassie's hand in his own as he dragged her along. His brother was there, too, talking to Wanda and laughing in his booming voice, as loud and thick as the thunder he commanded.   
  
"Verily, they grow so fast, would you not say, Wanda?" Thor asked and ruffled Loki's hair. The child scrunched his nose but his dismay was halfhearted at best - he enjoyed Thor's attention and affection more than he cared to admit.   
"Alas, a year older and still as restless as the devils of hell themselves. What mischief are you up to this time, brother?" The question was asked in a pacified tone, one speaking of genuine curiosity and a touch of excitement. Loki never got the chance to answer, however, as Wanda picked him up. He held on happily, eager to spend time with his mother and all-time favorite Avenger.   
  
"You mustn't blame him for his naughty streak, Thor. After all--"  
The following statement was affectionate and warm, nothing like what Loki felt at the sight of the figure that appeared at Wanda's side, red and black and radiating malice.  
"He got that from his father."  
  
The taloned hand that grabbed at his arm belonged to Mephisto, lord of one of the many hells. On a good day he made Loki uneasy and wary, on worse - he scared him. Right then, he filled the child with dread, bringing tears to his eyes as the boy flailed in panic. He reached for his mother and brother for help, only to find them both smiling and laughing. It was in that state of helplessness he realized his oversight -   
He let Cassie out of his sight, and as expected, was now to pay for his mistakes.  
  
"Insolent cretins!"   
Armored hands grabbed at the girl. She let out a loud shrill and reached out, struggled as hard as she could, to no avail. Doctor Doom had too good of a hold on her.  
"For your transgressions against Doom, you will all pay!"  
  
" _Cassie!_ "  
  
–  
  
He woke with a start, heart beating wildly in his chest, cold sweat covering his body, making his shirt cling to him uncomfortably. He glanced around, looking for either demon or tyrant, before realizing it was but a dream and that he was awake now. Thank Odin, he thought and ran a hand down his face before pushing himself up. His body ached from sleeping on the rocky ground of the cavern, and he groaned on his way to the small basin on the other side of the cave. The dream seemed familiar, he noted and took two handfuls of water to splash his face with. Did he have it before? A variation of it, at least, some details were wrong... he frowned and reached to collect more water only to freeze at the sight of his reflection. What terrified Loki wasn't the fact it was Billy's face staring back at him, but how long it took him to notice. This _was_ the wrong face, he insisted and felt over it with the tips of his fingers.   
Yes, of course, now the dream made sense. For all of Loki's past encounters with Mephisto and Doom, setting aside his brother's presence, there was no reason why the Scarlet Witch would celebrate his birthday, nor did he ever care too much for Cas--  
  
"Oh, you're finally awake."  
  
Loki turned back to find Loki-- no, to find _Billy_ in _Loki's body_ walking back into the cave. He had with him an assortment of herbs and berries Loki realized were all thankfully edible.   
  
"Please tell me you actually rested some and didn't spend all this time collecting berries."  
  
He was handed his portion without a reply. At first glance, Billy seemed distant and grumpy - not unlike how he'd been since teaming up with Loki. He sat down where Loki remembered he went to sleep and ate his odd salad quietly. Loki followed suit for the most part, though he kept looking in Billy's direction. Upon further inspection, it was obvious Billy was much worse off than before. While still irritable and obviously uncomfortable, Billy now seemed haunted, was the best word Loki had for it, and Loki had a nagging suspicion as to why that was so. After all, if _he_ had had such a horrid dream, and one that wasn't his own...  
  
"So," Loki began between munching on a berry and licking his fingers. "Sleep well?"  
  
"No," came the short reply with little else following it. Loki made a mental note of the blunt honesty as well as the accusing tone of voice utilized. It was enough to make him swallow hard and withdraw. By the time he even considered making another attempt, Billy was done and up and about. He washed his hands and mouth, had a drink, and then looked towards the exit.  
  
"Come on, we have a lot of ground left to cover."  
  
That much _was_ true, Loki knew and got ready, all the while deep in thought. Something was off, between the dream and the familiarity he felt seeing Billy's reflection, and how Billy himself was acting. Loki couldn't quite put his finger on it, but whatever it was, it couldn't be good.  
  
–  
  
Imps. Of all the creatures in all the worlds they could face, it had to be imps. _Again_. They couldn't escape the imps. Of course, they could've, they were so close to getting away, too, but then one look in their direction was all it took to get Loki to pounce. It went against every single shred of logic, but he had magic gathered at his clenched fists the next moment. Another moment and he would have engaged, but then someone- and really, who could it have been, given the circumstances?- tackled him, dropping him to the ground, a hand covering his mouth.  
"Sssh!" was hissed in his ear, and he was left with little choice but to oblige the request of the larger figure pinning him down.   
The imps stalled for a while before finally giving up and taking their leave. A few moments more and the two got back on their feet, dusting themselves off.  
  
"I could've handled it," Loki heard himself arguing, the frustration in his chest unbearable. He felt restless, that he had to act and every second in which he didn't brought him closer to the loss of his mind.   
His companion, on the other hand, was not impressed.  
  
"That, most likely, but what about the rest of them? Weren't you the one who told me to get a hold of myself and not pick a fight with the entire forest? This isn't like you, Loki."  
  
"...no, it is, indeed, not," Loki agreed in an awed whisper. Billy was right - this kind of reckless impatience was more _Billy_ 's thing, not Loki's. Meanwhile, Billy was displaying the kind of composure he had lacked the entire expedition so far - the kind Loki usually possessed.   
This meant nothing good for either of them.  
  
"Did you dream, Billy?" the misplaced trickster asked, earning himself a disapproving look. He waited not for a verbal response. "Because I did-- hear me out, this is important." He cared not for the rolling of those green eyes, only the fact that for the time being, Billy was putting up with it.  
"In my dream, I was a young boy. My birthday was being celebrated in an adequate manner in the one and only Memorial Garden of Avengers Mansion-- ah, yes, I knew that would pique your interest," Loki commented once Billy turned to look- stare- at him, quite shocked yet ultimately skeptical still.   
"As any healthy youth would, I ran around with some of my best friends, among them none other than Cassie Lang herself. Having spotted my brother, Thor, we ran up to him, and saw he was speaking to the Scarlet Witch - who, in my dream, was my mother. Fascinating, is it not? It is almost as though I was myself yet someone else at the same time."  
  
By this point Billy was looking quite stressed, so Loki wasted no time in reaching his point. "A wayward reference to my father - or yours - summoned Mephisto, roughly around the time good old Von Doom snatched Cassie away. I don't suppose I have witnessed first-hand one of your, what was it, post-war nightmares, did I?"  
The question was intended to force Billy to respond, and judging by the way Billy seemed ready to crawl away and hide somewhere, it worked.   
  
"How--"  
  
"Your _partner_ mentioned it," Loki explained, not waiting for the rest of the question. "Or would it be more accurate to say he brought it up shortly after we awoke to try and explain why 'you' were acting so unlike yourself."  
  
Ah, of course. He should've anticipated that mentioning Teddy would get Billy in full offensive mode.  
  
"If you've done _anything_ to him, Loki--!"  
  
Again Loki found odd comfort in Billy's rage, seeing as the instinctive possessiveness and protectiveness of Teddy was such a Billy-thing. It was reassuring to see at least this much wasn't too far buried.   
  
"Unless you consider disappointing him due to shying away from physical contact, no, we didn't do anything, and _not_ thanks to a lack of willingness on _his_ part, I assure you."  
  
Every second in which Loki wasn't punched was nothing less than a small miracle, even when considering their current bodies. Finally, Billy seemed willing to believe him. He looked away, anger giving way to a concerned frown.  
  
"The dreams started before the war, but they became noticeably worse after. There was only Mephisto, at first. Cassie and Doom..." he trailed off, fists clenching at his sides. "They're relatively recent additions."  
  
"Sounds about right, given what I heard," Loki concluded but added nothing as Billy faced him again, finally ready to answer his earlier question.  
  
"In _my_ dream... no, in the dream I saw, it was like standing in an aurora. Everything was shades of green and surreal, even for a dream. But it felt so real and vivid, more like a memory. We were someplace that was nowhere, but--"  
  
"Wait. 'We'?" Loki interjected, worry only thinly-veiled in his voice. The place sounded familiar, alright, and with the way Billy looked at him, cold and distant and so suspicious it was accusing, Loki knew what the scene Billy saw was before he confirmed it.   
  
"Myself, and... you, as a child. You were kneeling on the floor next to a pedestal with your helmet on it- old you- whatever..."  
  
Perhaps it was to torment him, that upon seeing Loki turn away, a hand covering his mouth, Billy continued.   
  
"You were holding a bird, a raven of some kind, and you looked at me like I murdered your best friend. 'I won', you said... and then you ate the bird, just sank your teeth into it--"  
  
"Magpie," Loki stated, clearly, sternly, bringing an end to Billy's description of the dream. It took him a while before he managed to look at Billy again, yet refused to meet his eyes.   
"It was a magpie."  
  
Would Billy question him further, Loki wondered. The time he confessed his sins was when Billy was away, preoccupied with battling Mother. Did the others fill him in? Did Billy realize exactly what- exactly _who_ \- he witnessed? If he did, he chose not to comment on it, much to Loki's gratitude.  
  
"For all the difference that makes..." Billy growled and crossed his arms. "We saw each other's dreams, then."  
  
"And that is a very, _very_ bad thing, my dear. It means we're doing more than merely looking like each other - we're _becoming_ one another."  
  
A strained silence lingered while the two stared at each other. A gnawing sensation began spreading in Loki's gut the longer he stared at Billy's face- at _his own_ face which Billy was currently wearing.  
"Sleeping in that cave was a mistake. The magical resonance must've sped the process, or altered it into something more complete and total. It is no longer merely skin deep, if you will."  
  
"It's really unlike you to make such an oversight."  
  
"Well, _I_ am quite unlike myself at the moment, aren't I?" Loki retorted. He wasn't quite offended as much as he was weary. The situation was only getting worse, and they were running out of time faster than he feared. Was there anything they could do other than go faster, though?  
  
"We need to find a way to slow this down, otherwise we'll be all swapped before we get there," Billy urged, echoing Loki's thoughts while sounding oddly hopeful about their odds.  
  
"It sounds like you have an idea. Let's hear it, then." Loki sounded apprehensive, but what did he really have to lose? Of course, when Billy held a hand up, fingers ready to be snapped, Loki was having second thoughts.  
  
"We _suit up_."  
  
A snap of Billy's fingers later, and Loki found himself wearing completely different attire. Opposed to the plain clothes he salvaged from Billy's closet, he was now wearing his, for lack of a better term, mission get-up. Not Billy's, mind, but Loki's own, with the scale-mail and the fingerless gloves, the trenchcoat and the golden tiara with its two horns. He looked at Billy and found him in a similar state of visual dissonance, still donning Loki's body yet wearing his own superhero suit, cape and blinking star-maps and everything. For a moment Loki wondered why he didn't change their physical appearance outright, but the feeling he got when he gave Billy another look-over, not unlike nausea, answered that question. They needed to remember not only who they really were, but also the problem at hand. This was perfect.  
  
"They do say the clothes make the man, don't they?"   
It was a good idea, and Loki wanted to credit it to the part of him Billy had absorbed, but knew better. The boy often got much less credit than he deserved.  
"It does help me feel a bit more... well, 'me'."  
  
"That should help, at least, but it's not a solution. Let's go."  
  
"Billy, wait."  
  
The teen-turned-Demigod spun on his heels, his cape spinning around him in a fluid motion. Loki couldn't help but smile; this was Billy's aesthetic, alright.   
  
"There's one more thing we should do, and that is to think of the things that make us _us_. In your case, I suggest your ever lovely boyfriend, and perhaps a certain musical film."  
  
"What's _your_ poison, then?"  
  
Loki pondered his options before shrugging. "Does it really matter if I counted them aloud?"  
  
"Not really," came the response far too quickly. Billy then turned around, granting Loki a moment longer to his thoughts. No, Billy didn't need to know Loki's 'poison', as he called it. He needn't know of the everlasting guilt and remorse over his weakness that made him wrong the boy so. Loki didn't need to actively think of what defined him those days - it was enough for him to exist so close to Billy to not be able to get it out of his mind.   
Granted, the time for such thoughts was limited. As they used magic, they let the rest of the forest know where they were, and the imps were more than eager to resume their earlier skirmish.  
  
"...oh, _bother_!" Loki concluded before taking off after Billy.  
  



	6. Chapter 6

At a point that might as well have been random, the creatures pursuing Billy and Loki left them alone, allowing the two to catch their breath, even if not quite relax. Did they outrun them, Billy wondered, or did the creatures simply wear themselves out? Perhaps they got bored, was another option, but Billy knew better than to think it was that simple. Still slightly out of breath, he glanced at Loki before looking at the narrow path between the trees. The air was thick and heavy with magic, its owner's presence pressing down on them menacingly. It was almost suffocating, and another glance in Loki's direction revealed Billy wasn't alone in feeling that way. Loki's fists were clenched, thin trails of sweat trickling down from behind his tiara. There was also a gulp, one Billy wasn't sure which of them was responsible for. Could've easily been both, their synchronization _has_ been improving, unfortunately.  
  
"The last time I was here, I used every trick in my book to sneak around and catch them by surprise," Loki explained, and was grateful Billy was both silent and still while he spoke. "This time is different. This time, they know we're coming."  
  
"Then let's face them head-on," Billy insisted, voice determined if a bit impatient and fist held up. "We have no reason to beat around the bush or hesitate."   
  
The small smile the boy's enthusiasm brought to Loki's lips caught even the trickster by surprise, but Loki decided to go with it.  
"Now _that_ sounds like something Billy Kaplan would say. You had me worried for a while you were becoming too... well, _me_."  
  
"How about we go make sure that sort of concern is a thing of the past?"  
  
"Aye aye, sir!"  
  
–  
  
The rest of the way wasn't devoid of spirits, but none of them seemed overly interested in the two travelers. No, Billy corrected himself; they were _fascinated_ with them, judging by how many eyes followed their every move. For whatever reason, they simply weren't attacking.  
  
"Think they were told to back off?"  
  
The question was rhetorical, and all but worthless, yet it made Billy feel better, oddly enough, less misplaced somehow. It was better than simply accepting the surreal situation without so much as a single line of criticism from his side.   
  
"Most likely," Loki replied regardless, and managed to sound almost bored. "Either we are allowed to preserve our strength to make the upcoming encounter more thrilling, or our host simply grew weary of waiting."  
  
"That would be my bet."  
  
"Agreed."  
  
A turn in the road brought the two to a stop. Billy could make out a clearing up ahead, and he had little doubt that was where they'd reach the end of it all, for better or _worse_ , if he knew his luck at all.  
  
"This is it," the misplaced witch whispered before looking at Loki. "I hope you're ready to grovel for forgiveness."  
  
The look Billy gave Loki was cold and untrusting and made Loki's insides turn to knots. It was oddly fitting, seeing that disapproving look on his own face, as Loki did have a tendency to be his own worst adversary, yet it offered a new kind of ache thanks to their outfits. It reminded him of who was truly glaring at him, providing the icing on the cake that was their already unpleasant predicament. The knowledge he got Billy involved in it all was by far the worst part of it.   
  
"I'll do my best, but you best hope for a miracle", he muttered under his breath. "This isn't exactly my forte."  
  
Not waiting for a response, he marched on, with Billy following a moment later.  
  
–  
  
Were these fireflies or glowing spirits, Billy wasn't sure. They filled the clearing just the same, bathing it in delicate light that made it all seem all the more surreal. Several large spirits occupied the area, some lying in plain sight, others - lurking in the shadows. Their presence could be felt, even if Billy couldn't actually see them.   
Despite the feigned disinterest, the two outsiders were carefully watched, with the spirits either sneering or theatrically looking away whenever eye contact was made. They weren't welcome there, yet as they were obviously being tolerated, allowed to remain for the time being by the higher power in the vicinity, they ventured deeper into the clearing. Right in the middle of it stood a large rock, serving as a natural pedestal for the ruler of the forest to lay atop. It was quite the magnificent creature, a large fox with a thick mass of fur twitching behind it. Billy couldn't count all nine tails, but it certainly seemed like there were at least that many, piled on top of each other. He wished he could see them spread out in what no doubt would've made a spectacular sight, even if that most likely spelled trouble for them. The realization he still had that sort of excitement in him was enough to draw a relieved chuckle out of him, but none of that lasted for long. The Huli Jing opened its eyes and raised its head to look at them. There was scrutiny and a touch of amusement, but also something hostile that became all too evident when the spirit looked at Loki. When again it looked at Billy, the animosity seemed to fade if briefly, but before Billy could even wonder about that, the fox snarled, then broke into loud laughter. The other spirits joined in, some sounding much less honest than the others, yet they all laughed regardless. Billy's eyes darted back and forth from one to the other as he tried to make sense of what was happening. Loki was in a similar state of distress, judging by the unnerved look he gave Billy when their eyes met. They looked then onto the leader of the mob, who was busy hitting the rock underneath it with its paw in laughter.  
After what seemed like an eternity, the fox finally settled down. It twitched its tails in a wave-like motion, and that was enough to silence the rest of the spirits. There was something about the way it looked at them that made Billy feel all the more wary, like a predator watching its prey.   
  
"What a _sight_ you two boys make. I'm afraid those starry-skies don't go overly well with your lying face, Loki," it purred with its eyes set on Billy, who pulled his cape closer around him.  
  
"And _this_ \--" the fox added, eyes going up and down Loki's form. "...is simply _insulting_."  
  
Loki looked down to find his own clothes adorning Billy's body. On this, he was inclined to agree.  
  
"How lucky I am to be a fan of high quality irony. Ah, ah, _ah_ \--" it held its paw up at the first attempt Billy made to say something. "Your next words best not be about how that's the wrong use of the term. You don't _really_ want to offend me further, do you, trickster?" It looked at the right person despite the wrong face, reassuring Loki the spirit was well aware of their situation.  
"Oh, don't look so surprised, of course I'd know. Who do you think put you there in the first place? Now, then, speak up, don't be shy. You didn't come all the way here just to stare, did you? That would be quite disappointing, not to mention anti-climatic. Amusing for me, though, if nothing else."  
  
Before Loki could gather his wits, Billy took a step forward, fists clenched at his sides. What few murmurs still persisted through the crowd were silenced, replaced with quiet tension.  The witch steeled himself.  
  
"What will it take for you to put us back?"  
  
It was more a demand than a question, a bold move Loki didn't find to be too wise a move right then. He looked from Billy to the fox in an attempt to gauge its reaction. Was that amusement, Loki wondered, and dared for a moment also to hope.  
  
"Straight to the point. I like that in a man," the fox ran its tongue over its snout. "And how joyous must it be to know it's something that's more _you_ than _him_ , eh, boy?"  
  
The obvious jab at Loki's expense didn't go unnoticed, yet it was left ultimately ignored. The Demigod himself didn't quite see the point, and Billy had no patience for such games.  
  
"If this is about what he stole from you--"  
  
Was that more Billy-like in its straightforwardness, or Loki-like in its inconsideration? Loki reacted the same regardless, practically jumping to Billy's side.  
"It's already in the All-Mother's possession, and quite out of my reach."  
It was a condemning statement, an attempt to berate Billy for going off like that. The fox was unimpressed by the exchange, its attention instead set on its paw, held in the air while it examined its claws.  
  
"That's reassuring to hear, truly. It's good it returned to its original owner safely."  
  
"It... is?" Loki breathed, intently ignoring the accusing look Billy was giving him. The fox in response did the best shrug a fox could manage.   
  
"Of course. It's bad karma to hold onto something that's not mine. Why, if you had been upfront and honest about it, I'd have given it back immediately!"  
  
Loki was astounded, enough that Billy's anger was quelled by some confusion at seeing him so lost. If only by shock alone, he felt compelled to speak.  
  
"I'm never one to pass up a chance to pile more guilt on this guy, but you're not exactly coming off as trustworthy on this matter."  
  
"HA!" the spirit rasped before shaking its head. It looked at Billy again with a smile that was fond and amused, a striking contrast to his mannerism when dealing with Loki. "An understandable notion, boy, yet consider this - what kind of fool would I have to be to refuse having Asgardia's All-Mother owe me a boon? At the very least, I'd be in their good graces."  
  
"You say that _now_ , sure. There's no guarantee you'd have acted on it back then."  
  
The amazement at the possibility of a peaceful encounter gave way to something different that struck a chord inside Loki. If he didn't know any better, he could've sworn Billy was speaking in his defense.   
The fox seemed to share that impression, for next he had his claws scratching over the rock, a clear sign of agitation and impatience.   
  
"You're quite audacious for someone here to be _saved_ , boy..."  
  
"Only I'm not. I'm here to strike a mutually beneficial bargain. We don't have to play nice for that."  
  
Sparks flew out of the fox's snout when it huffed. It lit a fire among the spirits as all burst into roars and yells, some jumping up and down, some flapping their wings in what were intended to be intimidating displays. Both spellcasters regained their wits fast enough to fall into a defensive stance, backs pressed together.  
  
"Was this _really_ necessary, Billy?"  
  
"Can it. We can take 'em."  
  
Only mercifully, there was no need to do so.  
  
" _BAHAHAHAHA!"_  
The laughter, equally loud as before yet oddly not quite as malicious, filled the clearing, catching spirits and outsiders equally by surprise. The fox shook its head as its laughter died down and he looked at Billy with something not unlike warmth in its eyes.  
"Oh, we _like_ this one. He can stay."  
  
A twitch of the tails later, the fox seemed more at ease, while in a more business-focused mindset.   
"You're not wrong, boy. No, we don't have to play nice to do business."  
  
"Shall we, then?" the misplaced witch asked and finally put some distance between Loki and himself, now that they weren't in too immediate a danger anymore. The Huli Jing looked from one to the other, before leaning down for a stretch.  
  
"It's easy enough-- _hnnng_ \-- figuring out what _you_ want--" It leaned back, then forward, then shook itself and all its tails before sitting down, back straight. It seemed quite impressive, and well in its element. Billy hated being on opposite sides with this being.  
"You came to find a way to get back to your own bodies... well, or something along those lines," he said, looking straight at Loki,  who clenched his teeth but otherwise said little in direct response to it. He wasn't quite so fortunate regarding the rest of what the fox had to say.   
  
"But what about _your_ end of the bargain? How will you make it up to me?"  
  
It wasn't until Loki realized Billy too was staring at him that he finally moved, turning to face his companion. Billy was nudging towards the fox with his head, and Loki had to appreciate how loud his eyes were, even outside of his own body. This was it, wasn't it, Loki thought while the fox did its equivalent of raising a brow. There was no more stalling, and for the life of him, he couldn't think of another way out of this. He looked back at Billy, not in confusion, nor in plea, but acceptance and a touch of regret. _This_ was the person he should really say these words to, he knew, yet forced that thought out of his mind and took a step forward. This was one crime he was actually to pay for, and sooner rather than later for a change, so he took a deep breath, clenched his fists, exhaled, and did what at one point in his existence he thought he'd never be forced to do -  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
Loki apologized.   
  
"I snuck into your home, attacked you, stole from you. It's true I had no way of knowing if you'd have cooperated or not, but I should have tried, first, aimed for a peaceful solution. I didn't, and as a result, I wronged you. I truly am sorry."  
  
The silence that fell was crushing. No spirit made a sound, those who needed air, held it in. The wind blew, the lone offender of making a sound. The event that took place was so unbelievable, so unnatural, it defied belief. And yet for all the moment's grandeur and rarity, Billy realized, as something sank inside him - the fox was snarling.  
  
"That's _it_...?!" the question, though whispered, was an accusing demand. "You came all the way from your pretty, clean home, stumbled through _my_ woods, and when you're finally before me, _this_ is the best you can do?!"  
  
It's not that Loki didn't try to reply. The fox was obviously dissatisfied with his apology - small surprise, given his lack of experience in the field - and the trickster raked his mind in a desperate attempt to do better. The fox gave him ample time to do so, it seemed, yet for all his wit and cunning, Loki drew up a blank. It was enough to do the impossible and actually make things worse.  
  
" _Arrogant cretin_!"  
  
All nine of the fox's tails spread. Flames lit at their ends and quickly spread into a ring right before it leapt forward. Several spirits lunged at Billy, holding him down while their leader's claws met Loki's chest and it dropped him to the ground. The fire still burned brightly, lighting up the clearing and threatening to engulf all who stood too close. It was a risk Billy was willing to take, if not for Loki's hand which he held up, keeping his companion at bay. Whatever was to come, he'd go through it, was that it? Billy found this would-be sacrifice hard to believe but stood his ground for the time being. At least until they heard what the fox had to say, hopefully before it ripped Loki's head off.  Granted, it had to stop seething flames, first.  
  
"Wronged me... _wronged_ me?!" it roared, the flames around its tails blazing to the point most of the lesser spirits ran away. "You barged in here and _humiliated_ me! Made me into a laughingstock, the very image of ridicule, with your boot on my fur! I should incinerate you where you lie, and scatter the ashes across the nine realms where not even your precious all-seeing All-Father can find all of you and put you back together!"  
With every angry breath, a flare lit at the end of its snout, threatening to singe Loki's face - the face not his own. Perhaps that was why the fox ultimately calmed down, or rather forced its rage back. It still burned brightly, yet it was now as cold as its eyes when the fox let the flames around it subside. Head held high, it stepped off of Loki and turned around.  
"But I will not. It is time someone taught you a _proper_ lesson. On your feet, trickster."  
  
The intermission was foreboding rather than comforting. Loki pushed himself up while looking at Billy. The witch was still guarded, though two of his guards were replaced, the original ones having fled the fox's rage. He seemed to be handling himself, so Loki turned his attention back to the Huli Jing. The fox spirit stood tall, back straight and all nine tails spread and swaying. It looked nothing short of majestic, and not even the intense loathing in its eyes hindered the sense of awe it inspired. If anything, it contributed to it. Its gaze was set directly at Loki, its snarl tainted by a touch of satisfaction at what was about to unfold.  
  
"Now... _kneel_."  
  
The surprise was momentary as Loki realized he did, in fact, see it coming. There was only one way the spirit would be pacified enough to help them, and that was by inflicting back shame at least equal to the one it suffered through. Loki descended, just slowly enough to let his audience enjoy the show. He did so with a knot forming in his gut. This was too simple, too easy, and he was right, for as soon as Loki was on his knees, a lone word was spoken.  
  
" _Lower_."  
  
Lower still he went, abiding the spat-out demand. No sooner did he begin to bow his head was he pushed down the rest of the way with a clawed paw on his head. His tiara was flung aside as his face was shoved into the mud and held there despite his struggles.   
  
"Lower, lower... lower still I'd have sent you, scum, if it were your own suit of flesh! Behold now, Loki, God of Mischief and Lies, whose silver tongue could not even concoct a proper apology! What is it good for, then? Nothing! Barely the mud and dirt on your lips! Enjoy a mouthful, _cur_! It's more than you deserve... as was my _gift_ to you, which you so foolishly squandered! A new face, a new _life_ , detached from all you died to escape! A family that loves you; friends who accept and support you; a fairy-tale lover, forever unknowing... but you went and threw it all away! For what, trickster?! For your _conscience_ , whose screams are still heard, carried by the winds? Spare me, we all know just how foul you are, to the core of your being!"  
  
The fox climbed over Loki's back, then leaned down to whisper by his ear, poisonous words for him alone.  
"You touched yourself like this, didn't you? Touched _him_. Come now, trickster, we both know you've longed to do that even in your child form, and now your adult self was given all the access you could ever have wanted. You can tell me you didn't even think of it; I will believe you _not_."  
  
Dirt shifted as Loki's fists clenched, grabbing handfuls of soil. The fox's tails twitched in delight at the shiver that ran down Loki's back. It pushed itself up and rested more of its weight on Loki's shoulders.  
  
"We both know the truth. No matter how many times you will be reborn, no matter how many lives you will live, how many numerous faces you will wear, your own or others', it will avail you not. To the day reality crumbles and the nine realms are no more, even then, in the void that will remain, one truth will prevail - you were, are, and always will be _Loki_."  
The word dripped all the hate and resentment the fox harbored towards the man at its feet, spoken with its face twisted into a deep snarl distorted with loathing. It was the climax, after which all it could spare showing was cold disdain.  
"Rejoice, false son of Odin," the spirit continued as it stepped off Loki and motioned for the spirits holding Billy down to release him as the fox retook its place atop the rock. "So few of us have the comfort of such certainty in any of our lives, let alone all of them."  
  
Now free, Billy could only stare down at Loki. So much of what the fox said resonated with him it was a bit overwhelming. After all, he too was wronged by the Demigod, and so thoroughly at that, not a single aspect of his life left untainted. And yet for some reason, as he watched Loki down on the ground, face and hands in dirt and mud, he found no joy in the spectacle.  
Whether or not he was about to help Loki up was left unanswered. Loki held his hand up to keep Billy at bay before pushing himself up and grabbing his discarded tiara on the way. He dusted both himself and the item off before studying it. For an instant, Billy wasn't sure whether or not he would put it on again, but then Loki did, and seemed almost... proud.  
  
_Being Loki is_ my _cross to bear_... was what he told Billy, wasn't it?  
  
"Was that enough to satisfy you, O spirit?" Loki asked and brushed the final specks of dirt off his cheek. "Or shall I bow once more?"  
The Huli Jing looked him over, then turned away with a huff.   
  
"How glorious you were facing down. Seeing the wrong face would've _completely_ ruined this for me."  
One dramatic sigh later and the fox turned back to the two with a completely different demeanor. It wasn't that the hate and anger were gone, per-se, but there was noticeably more amusement and interest. Now that it's had its due, were they allowed to be entertaining playthings, Billy wondered, eyes trained on the spirit.  
  
"Are you ready to swap us back now or not?"  
  
"No."  
The answer, simple and blunt, caught the two misplaced boys by surprise. They stared openly while the fox examined its clawed paw.  
"Oh, come now. _Whenever_ did I say anything about _that_ , let alone strike a bargain involving it?"  
  
_~You came to find a way to get back to your own bodies~_  
  
Loki hissed while Billy let out a louder, more profane sound of disapproval before pointing angrily at Loki.  
  
"This is why people like you don't have any friends!"  
  
The fact he had _one_ stood on Loki's tongue, but he swallowed it, instead directing his offense at the fox. The fox never denied being satisfied with what eventually transpired - it had received its due and set the deal in stone; now it was their turn.  
  
"While in no way doubting your obligation to our pact, I'd like to know why you can't do it yourself. It is, after all, your curse we're under, is it not?"  
  
"Once upon a time, at least," the Huli Jing began before stretching again. "You felt it-- _hnngg_ \-- at the cave, didn't you?" It shook itself before sitting down, tails twitching idly. "The spell changed. The time you spent where all magical energies in the forest converge mutated it. It works faster, runs deeper, and is too powerful even for myself to undo. _Not_ a mistake I'd have expected from _you_ , Loki. Imagine my surprise when I heard the reports..."  
  
Loki swore under his breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. Billy in the meantime tried to keep a semblance of calm to him.  
  
"But it _can_ be reversed, right? You _did_ promise us a way to do _that_."  
  
"That I did, boy." Sitting more upright, the fox lost the playful air it only recently acquired. "It is no easy feat, undoing this mess. You will need to harness a power that is pure, untainted, and all but limitless."  
  
"Oh, is _that_ all?" Billy interjected, a dejected smile on his lips. "For a moment I was worried it would be difficult!" Turning serious again, he glared at Loki. " _Now_ can we contact Strange and Wanda?"  
  
"Your Sorcerer Supreme will be of no use, boy," the fox commented. "Outside interference is likelier to break your link back--"  
  
"Told you so."  
  
"Shut it, Loki."  
  
The fox cleared its throat, attempting to ignore their banter.   
"Outside help is also redundant. You already have access to quite a fitting source of power."  
Having said that, it narrowed its eyes at Loki, a smirk baring its fangs. "Well, one of you does, at least."  
  
"That means... what?" Billy asked, ignoring the almost knowing, pained look on Loki's face. "What power are we supposed to call on?"  
  
The fox on its part stretched again before jumping off the rock. "Let's just say I'm old fashioned. I _could_ give you another hint, but why bother when it's so much easier simply sending you there?"  
Before either could react, the fox spread its tails and again the flames gathered around it. A twitch of its body, and the fire danced around the two, building up into a storm to serve as a portal.   
"You'll find all you need where you're headed, and with this, I live up to my end of the bargain. Loki--"  Even through the flames, the sneer was evident on its face. "The next time you cross me will not be a learning experience. I _will_ end you. Remember that."  
  
Loki offered a solemn nod, leaving the fox to turn to Billy. The look on its face when their eyes met was unlike anything Billy saw on the creature before, leaving him confused. It looked guilty and apologetic, two things Billy wasn't quite expecting.  
  
"Let me say this, boy... _William_. Had I realized whom it was I was toying with, you'd have been spared this grief. Rest assured, I _will_ make it up to you. I ask only that if your time comes before that happens, try not to think _too_ badly of me."  
  
"What--!"  
  
The flames raged, dancing in circles around them. The air rippled with the fox's magic, and even when the flames engulfed them, they did not burn.   
  
"Until we meet again, Demiurge."  
  
A flash of light later left them elsewhere. The fox's parting words rang loudly in Billy's ears, leaving a gnawing pit in his gut. Demiurge... so the fox knew, too? How many others did? And what did any of it mean, anyway?!  
  
"... _oh_ ," Billy heard Loki say as though from a great distance. He finally paid attention to his surroundings, only to realize he knew full well where the fox sent them.  
  
"Well, this certainly explains things, wouldn't you say?" Loki continued, but Billy had no time to spare him. They were home- Billy's home. It was a very specific room they were in, to be precise, and the pit in his gut increased in size threefolds when the room's main resident finally acknowledged their presence.  
  
"That makes me so happy to hear. Why don't you fill me in, too?"  
  
Billy steeled himself before turning around to face him. Teddy. Of all the places the fox could've sent them to look for this magical force, it had to be Teddy's room, with Teddy right there with them.   
  
"Oh, _bother_!"  
  
"You said it," Loki agreed, and couldn't blame Billy for pulling his hood up over his head.  
  



	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of a 2-part update

Billy's mind was frantically racing to make sense of any of it, with his heart beating in an equally eccentric manner. He was stupid and made such a beginner's mistake - he let himself think it was over. After too long in Loki's presence again - _Loki,_ of all people! - they finally found the one responsible and even managed to get the fox to help. Even when all they got were more riddles and eerie clues, Billy let his guard down and thought, for a moment, that this might be over before long, and he could go back to the life Loki was currently occupying.   
But when has anything ever gone smoothly for Billy Kaplan? No, now he had to live through the reality of still being in Loki's body, rapidly _becoming_ Loki with each passing second, and with none other than Teddy standing right there, staring at the two of them with caution and unease, and confusion either way. The Huli Jing cared not for timing and so they found Teddy in a pair of pants, but still without a shirt, his towel still at hand and hair dripping. He looked from Billy to Loki and back, eyes going down their forms before focusing on the faces that didn't add up with their clothes. He either recovered enough, or had good enough instincts to begin with, because Billy detected a certain edge to his stance, a readiness, and a hand at his side, clenching and unclenching into a fist, no doubt ready to be changed into whatever form will give him a benefit. Billy would've been impressed if not for the look in Teddy's eyes that let him know he was considered a threat - an enemy. It tore through the misplaced witch like a blunt knife, but he forced himself to shift his attention, instead finding odd hope that between the confusion and the fact his family was on the other side of the door, Teddy wouldn't act before they had the chance to explain the situation. Granted, Billy would've been quite alright with Teddy never finding out about any of this, yet here they were, stranded in the most unimaginable stand-off, and every second made the silence even less bearable than before.   
It was by some act of higher mercy that Loki lacked both Teddy's confusion as well as Billy's unease and reluctance to engage his partner, and so finally, the silence was broken.  
  
"Would you like to do the honors, or should I?" the misplaced trickster asked, sounding almost cheerful, carefree, at least. The notion served to unnerve Billy further, but Teddy was as impatient as ever and wasn't about to let him recover.   
  
"I could care less. Just... either of you, start talking. _Now_ ," he demanded, the look in his eyes now more one of discomfort. Billy yielded, offering half a shrug before looking away. That was enough for Loki.  
  
"To start off, I would advise, in this case, to _yes_ judge a book by its cover," Loki said and ran a hand down over his outfit. "The content--" he pointed at his face. "--can be _quite_ misleading."  
  
Teddy's brows furrowed as the words sank in. The reality they painted was, unbelievable aside, quite an unfavorable one. He kept looking from one to the other, as though waiting for something to prove Loki wrong. Nothing of the sort happened, forcing him to respond.  
  
"Let me get this straight. You're telling me, basically, that _you_ 're actually _Loki_ , despite that face..." He frowned at Loki before turning to Billy. "And that this is..." A look of horrified comprehension crossed his face when he finally let himself take 'the cover' into account.  
  
"Billy...?" The name was whispered, as though saying it more loudly would erase any possibility it was false. And yet, though he wanted to reject it as much as Teddy did, Billy knew better, and also that they didn't have time to ease Teddy into it.  
  
"Hi, Tee," he finally said, and frowned under his hood at how the endearment sounded in Loki's voice. Teddy had a similar reaction at first, with the changeling holding onto his confusion. It broke into distress, but that soon gave way to righteous anger when he turned to Loki again.  
  
"What did you do _now_?!" The question was full of accusation and devoid of either patience or sympathy. Loki was certain that had he not been in his current vessel, he'd have likely been pinned to a wall, at the very least, his collar grabbed. As it was, Teddy was obviously holding himself back, and Loki wasn't about to waste what small mercies he was granted.   
  
"I'll have you know my goals were pure and sound, Teddy. Now, as for my _methods_ , well..." Loki cleared his throat. "As a result, I have incurred the wrath of quite a powerful, _vindictive_ Kitsune--"  
  
"Huli Jing, and you're doing that on purpose."  
  
Loki eyed Billy briefly before continuing, pardoning the boy's nervous outburst.   
"A _Huli Jing_ , pardon. It changes little how myself and your partner have swapped places, and are currently on a quest to switch back. We _did_ meet the spirit responsible, but unfortunately, it is no longer able to help us."  
  
"Able, or _willing_?" Teddy accused with a quirked brow. He managed to almost enjoy the way Loki squirmed as a result, but the next moment Billy finally spoke, putting an end to the awkward stare-down.  
  
"We made a deal, Teddy," Billy explained, leaving Teddy confused at the seeming show of support. It was a brief pause, however, and he instantly pressed on.  
  
"And how do we know the deal wasn't full of loopholes to trick you, so _he_ wouldn't have to bother?"  
  
Billy lowered his gaze, missing the way Loki winced. Teddy did have a point, but for all his spite and bitterness towards Loki, it still didn't ring true.   
  
"It apologized to me, Ted."  
  
"That doesn't--"  
  
"It knew I was the _Demiurge_."  
  
That left Teddy at a momentary loss for words as he contemplated the new piece of information.  
"Even if it would've crossed Loki... it wouldn't cross you, is what you're saying."  
  
"No more than it already did, at least."  
  
Teddy nodded and took another moment to process as much as he could. Any warmth that came to his eyes when he looked at Loki's borrowed face faded almost instantly when he recalled who was really behind those features. Similarly, there was an air of caution to him whenever he looked at Billy, who in response pulled his hood forward to cover as much of his face as he could. There seemed to be enough of... _something_ there, though, because Teddy finally seemed to relax a bit, his fists unclenching as he took a step towards Billy. The misplaced witch tensed. This was not a form he felt comfortable having Teddy close in, but the comfort his partner's presence offered was too good to pass up on. As soon as he showed the first signs of letting his guard down he had Teddy's hand on his shoulder, and the offer of a hesitant, yet supportive smile.   
  
"Ok... what's our next move?" he asked, looking briefly at Loki before looking back at Billy who was scratching the back of his neck through the hood.   
  
"I can't believe you actually bought any of this..."  
  
"I probably wouldn't have if only one of you came at me. Like this, though? With the both of you the way you are? I hate accepting any of this is real, but it's kind of hard not to."  
  
"Told you so."  
  
" _Not_ the time, _William_ ," Loki berated in a cross between a hiss and an exasperated sigh. Teddy frowned at the two but let it go in favor of getting the conversation back on track.  
  
"Again - what now? You said your spirit couldn't swap you back...?"  
  
"It gave us leads, though, clues, at least--"  
  
"That's far from fair, Billy; we were sent right where the solution to our woes is."  
  
Billy stared at Loki with obvious disbelief and a generous amount of suspicion.   
"What are you talking about? That--"  
  
"Should have already been made clear to you, unless you're not as big a Disney fan as you claim to be."  
  
Billy's frustrations momentarily mixed with confusion before his eyes widened in terrified realization.  
  
" _Nooooooooooo_!"  
  
"Yes," Loki countered simply, arms crossed and an amused smile on his lips. Billy looked away at his partner before shaking his head at Loki.  
  
"You have _got_ to be kidding me. Why is that even a _thing_?!"  
  
"Ok, listen--" Teddy interjected, leaning a bit more into Billy's line of sight. "How about you pretend I wasn't there with you... because, you know, I _wasn't_ ," he stressed and tugged at Billy's shoulder, making the witch better face him. "And fill me in on this so I know what's going on, too."  
  
"I'll let you do the honors," Loki purred, a smug grin on his lips to meet Billy's glare with. Billy proceeded to pinch the bridge of his nose before turning to Teddy, his demeanor noticeably less hostile than a moment ago.  
  
"Mistakes were made on our way there and the fox can't swap us back as a result."  
  
"That part I got, go on."  
  
Billy nodded briefly and took a stabilizing breath. "What it _did_ have for us, well, we _can_ go back if we were to tap into, how did it put it--"  
  
"A power that is pure, untainted, and all but limitless," Loki chipped in quite gleefully.   
  
"So much for letting me do the honors."  
  
"Apologies, I couldn't help myself."  
  
Billy rolled his eyes and returned his attention to Teddy, who was trying to make heads and tails of the situation without paying Loki too much mind.   
  
"So glad that's _all_ we have to do."  
  
"That's roughly what _he_ said," Loki offered and motioned at Billy, who growled back. Teddy too was less than appreciative of the gesture, but again pushed on, regardless, squeezing Billy's shoulder again to win back his attention.  
  
"What I don't get is how are we supposed to call forth... _whatever_... in the middle of my room."  
  
Loki cleared his throat to cover a chuckle and turned away to not see Billy's renewed glare, so fierce his eyes were glowing under his hood.  
  
"Ok, officially distraught now," was what Teddy had to offer.  
Billy palmed his face, head shaking.  
  
"Put your Disney goggles on."  
  
Teddy scrunched his nose, but decided to try it anyway. He thought the situation over along with the information provided, before finally opening his eyes wide.  
  
"There you go."  
  
" _Noooooooooo_ ," Teddy exclaimed, similarly to how Billy did before. "This is becoming a thing. Why is this becoming a _thing_ , Billy?!"  
  
"Hell if I knew."  
  
"Because, young Padawans," Loki chose that moment to interfere again, finding the display endearing yet ultimately the kind of wasteful they couldn't afford. It could've been his own serious air despite his playful words, or merely his reminded presence; regardless, the two teens abandoned all playfulness, their eyes trained on him. " _Love_ is one of the greatest forces one can call upon, if they have access to it, and much to the chagrin of many, yes, it can also be used in things such as magical rites. Powerful and pure, it should be just enough to set things right. Thankfully for us all, it seems you two can still access it."  
  
"No thanks to _you_."  
  
Ah, it's been a while since Billy last made such an obvious, hostile jab at him, Loki found himself unprepared. Mercifully, while Teddy was equally hostile, he knew the fastest way to get rid of Loki was to get it over with.  
  
"Now that we've established Kang the Conqueror is a better matchmaker than Loki is a homewrecker, how are we supposed to invoke the, uh... power of love? I can't believe I just said that."  
  
A small, weary snicker came from Billy's direction, while Loki shook his head again.  
  
"Our kind spirit clued us in on this, too, or have you forgotten, Billy? Those claims of being _old fashioned_."  
  
"...a kiss?" The couple exchanged worried looks.  
  
"It worked in the fairy-tales, or rather, certain variations of them. We _are_ dealing with a creature of myth and legend. At the very least, it's worth a shot."  
  
"He's right about that," Teddy said after a short while and looked at his partner. "It's also the _only_ idea we have, right now."  
  
"Yeah, but..."  
  
Much to Teddy's surprise, Billy pulled back and seemed uneasy at the concept.   
"Which of us are you supposed to kiss?"  
  
"Ex _cuse_ me?!" Teddy yelped before looking at Loki, as though looking for what the trickster has done now to bring this disconcerting reaction about. Billy merely shrugged back.  
  
"I'm me, at least for a while longer, but we _have_ been... _mixing_ for a while, and Loki's in my body on top of it... doesn't that make him into an option? The likelier one, even?"  
  
Teddy shook his head slowly, utterly aghast. "I can't believe you'd even _consider_ \--"  
  
"Me, I'm just _disappointed_ ," Loki interjected, arms crossed and a frown on his face. "The fact you used a different name should already be enough of an indication I'm still someone other than you. In addition, while I do fully appreciate your handsome face and shapely thighs--" Loki patted his cheeks, then thighs for good measure. "I should _hope_ that's not _all_ Teddy sees in you."  
  
"It's not," Teddy was quick to follow up with. His voice, soft and fond, caught Billy by surprise and left him at a loss for words. Seizing the opportunity, Teddy closed the distance, hands moving up and down Billy's arms. "It's a nice bonus, but that's _not_ what I'm here for."  
  
The hood made it easier for Billy to avoid eye contact, a clear indication he wasn't comfortable, but he rested his hands over Teddy's hips just the same, and showed just enough of his face for Teddy to identify something not unlike bashfulness.  
  
"I _know_ that, that's not what--"  
  
"I know," Teddy countered softly. "But I felt like saying it, anyway."  
  
Billy smiled back before nibbling on his lower lip.  
  
"So... we're going to do this?"  
  
"No time like the present, right?"  
  
The witch nodded and began leaning in, only to stop and look at Loki, who had been pointedly looking away for the duration of the exchange.  
  
"Are you ok with this, Loki? It's _your_ body."  
  
Loki hid his smile behind his hand, finding the question far from uncalled for, but endearing and sweet just the same.  
  
"This is currently our best and only hope of changing back; I am willing to make the sacrifice. Besides, we could've done _much_ worse than your partner here."  
  
"If you say so..." Billy obliged reluctantly, only to offer Loki a small smirk. "No peeking."  
  
Loki clicked his tongue but still turned around, hands raised in defeat.  
"Spoilsport."  
  
Now as alone as they could get, Billy and Teddy focused on each other. They both knew what had to be done, had done it together numerous times, but still Teddy seemed uneasy. Billy couldn't blame him, all things considered, even if having Teddy shy away from him stuck that icy knife back through his gut.   
  
"Are _you_ ok with this?"  
  
"Yeah, I mean... I just have to close my eyes and think of a certain someone I like a whole lot, right? Shouldn't be _too_ hard," Teddy offered lightly enough and glanced slightly up. "I won't lie; the hood helps."  
  
"How about this, then?" The question preceded a shift as Billy bent his knees, bowing over slightly so he was shorter than Teddy. His grin was well visible despite the hood, and it widened when his antics drew a short laugh out of Teddy, who pulled him up and closer than before.   
  
"What, and deny me the chance of being the shorter one for a change? No way, Kaplan."  
  
"You do realize you're a _shapeshifter_ , right?"  
  
"Don't distract me with the details."  
  
This was better, Billy decided. The air between them felt lighter with an underlying warmth the kind he was well familiar with. He bettered his hold around Teddy's waist and closed the distance, slightly foreign due to the reversed height difference. The soft warmth he met was the same as ever, though, as was everything it conveyed.  
  
The two behind him fell silent, so Loki bade his time, attentive to any changes in the air, minute as they may be. There were some noises coming in from the other side of the door, but Loki could still hear the finer sounds that came from within the room. Sounds such as breathing that gradually grew heavier, or subtle rustling of clothes, or-- oh. _Sounds_. It was that subtle moan that made him shake his head with a fond, tired smile before looking aside at the window. The room was brightly lit due to the late hour, and with the evening's darkness having already set outside, the glass served well enough as a mirror. The reflection it showed made Loki's lips part in awe. For the first time since their debacle began, his own face; he had his own face staring back at him.  
Soft gasps from behind him he couldn't exclusively attribute to passion were telling, so Loki turned around to find the two teens staring at each other over the small distance between them, having moved just enough to break the kiss. Was it the changed height difference that clued them in, Loki wondered, before closing his eyes with another smile while Teddy reached to pull the hood off of Billy's head, finally revealing the right face underneath.   
  
"It worked...?" Billy asked, voice fragile and unbelieving.   
Teddy replied with the widest, brightest grin Loki's seen in quite a while, but instead of giving a verbal reply, Teddy cupped Billy's cheeks with both hands and kissed him again.  
  
"It worked," he finally said, arms moving around Billy's waist and forehead pressing against the other's.  
"Welcome back."  
  
The way Billy's eyes closed, and the joyous, candid smile he wore made something tug in Loki's chest. It was bittersweet, and he decided to hold onto the sweeter portion of it as he tore his gaze away.  
"And they all lived happily ever after," the trickster whispered without looking at the two for reactions. "Or... some of them did, at least," was added with a shrug. Loki was once again fully Loki, but as tragic as that was, at least Billy was spared that fate. Glass half full, yes?  
"Now, gentlemen, I can't possibly imagine my presence is a welcomed one. By your leave."  
  
The door wasn't an option, so Loki opted for the window, instead. He had already caused them enough grief; the sooner he removed himself from their lives, the better. There was nothing left to say, anyway--  
  
" _Wait_."  
  
Or so he thought.  
Shocked, Loki looked over his shoulder to find Teddy staring at Billy with as much amazement as Loki, only with slight resentment and a lot of concern. What reason could Billy possibly have to delay his departure? What was so important that Billy actually pulled away from Teddy - much to the lost prince's dismay - and turned to face Loki? Understandably, eye contact was hard to come by. Billy made several attempts before finally letting out a heavy sigh. He looked Loki straight in the eye, gaze leveled and grim. There was something else there, too, something Loki couldn't quite place, perhaps because it was so rarely directed at him.  
  
"This isn't on you."  
  
For all his words, his wit, his cunning, his mischief and lies and millennia of lived experiences to fall back on, Loki was speechless. He was so used to taking the blame even when it wasn't his fault, and so often it was, the development was, for lack of a more fitting term - new. Perhaps that was why Loki did what came so natural when the boy was concerned and rather than cut his losses - put his foot in his mouth.  
  
"Are we... _good_ , then?"  
  
" _No_ ," came the immediate hiss that put Loki back in his place. It lacked the kind of punch Billy's angry jabs usually held to them, instead carrying something much more profound. Perhaps that was why what came next was as placid as it was, and equally as surprising.  
  
"But not because of this."  
  
It was fair, more than Loki probably deserved, but he wasn't about to argue that point. He held on to those few, precious words with every fiber of his being, instead.  
"Thank you," was all he found appropriate enough to say. Nothing else felt any semblance of fitting.  
Lips pursed, he looked at Teddy who seemed quite displeased by this development, but said nothing, most likely so as to not hinder Loki's departure any longer. Billy met Loki's gaze with a steadiness that was almost concerning, but oddly fitting. Loki then nodded his silent farewell before turning away. This time no one said anything when he opened the window and saw himself out.  
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2nd part of a double update.
> 
> Minor reference to my fic "Give it to me straight, doc" over halfway through. 
> 
> Relevant: [Spoon theory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoon_theory)

It wasn't until the window touched the pane with a soft sound that Billy let out a heavy sigh, posture finally breaking. His shoulders slumped and his eyes closed; he'd have gravitated towards the bed, but two arms wrapped around him, and a warm body pressed against his back, keeping him in place. A tired smile rose to BIlly's lips when he felt Teddy's face against his shoulder. "Hi," he heard said softly next to his ear, so he tilted his head against Teddy's.   
  
"Hey," came the worn out reply, that for all his efforts, was the best Billy could manage. Teddy didn't seem to mind and simply bettered his hold, keeping his partner up.   
"Come here often?"  
  
Teddy snorted at the attempt before letting go just enough for the witch to turn around and wrap his arms around Teddy's waist.  
"Oh, you _could_ say that..." Teddy played along briefly before taking a moment to examine Billy's face. "You look _exhausted_ ," he concluded and brushed messy black strands away with the back of his fingers. Billy leaned into the touch, a soft pant leaving him.   
  
"You _could_ say that... running, fighting, _non-stop Loki_..."  
  
"Body-swapped with the God of Mischief, huh? Now there's a trope I bet you never thought you'd put on your resume."  
  
Billy groaned, the sound obscene and quite unflattering as he buried his face in Teddy's shoulder. Teddy hugged him tight, one hand rubbing circles over his back.  
  
"It's over now. You're back."  
  
It took a while for the words to sink in, but then Billy twitched his head in a nod.  
"Finally."  
The fact he leaned even more of his weight against Teddy didn't seem to bother the changeling, who didn't budge, simply keeping his face against the side of Billy's head, inhaling the dirt and dust and the road traveled. He opted to wait until Billy relaxed some, but when he realized Billy was likelier to fall asleep, Teddy changed his course of action.  
  
"How about this?" he asked and pulled back, forcing Billy to stand on his own. "You go shower, wash it all off. Meanwhile, I'll go and get you something to eat and drink. What do you say?"  
  
Much to Teddy's surprise, Billy scrunched his nose.   
  
"So long as it's not herbs and berries."  
  
"That's... a no on the salad, then. Gotcha."  
  
The chuckle the tease got out of Billy was more than worth it.   
  
"Go on, you've earned it. And then--"  
  
"I'll tell you all about it."  
  
Teddy took a moment to appraise Billy's condition before smoothing the messy bangs away again.  
"Only if you're up to it. I won't hold it against you if you fell asleep."  
  
"Better do it now before _denial_ properly kicks in. But... first thing's first, right?"  
  
"One step at a time, too. That's how we roll."  
  
Putting distance between them was quite difficult to accomplish, and left the mage feeling cold and lonely, but Billy managed to do so regardless. He even managed to get as far as the door before he came to a stop and blinked down at himself. Two tugs at his cape later and the thing was gone, dissipating into a flurry of sparks that faded away within seconds.  
  
"Less conspicuous."  
  
"True that," Teddy acknowledged and saw him off. He then took a moment to breathe and collect himself after the whirlwind of events that took place and information that was dumped on him. He'd make damn sure to get as many details out of Billy as possible, but later. Right then, he had a worn-out boyfriend to care for, and if he knew anything about how Billy felt about Loki - and he did - he had a _distraught_ boyfriend to tend to, as well. Determined to do what he could for him, Teddy made his way to the kitchen, and idly tried to decipher just how serious Billy was about the 'no berries and herbs' thing, and if lettuce fell under that.  
  
–  
  
Homecoming was less than ideal for Loki. Several of the traps Billy had laid out in jam were still primed, though noticeably easier to disarm now that Loki was in his own body, and Billy wasn't there to actively power the spells. That said, there _was_ still a lot of jam all over, and the notion of cleaning it made Loki sigh in despair. He hoped jam-stains were easier to clean than punch, as he wasn't in the mood of replacing a carpet again, not to mention the couch, or the curtains, why would Billy even--- right, there _was_ that trick Loki taught him... a fond smile found its way to his lips before he knew what was happening, but the favorable memory soon gave way to less enjoyable mental images, the last of which was the final look Billy gave him before they parted ways not an hour ago. Loki still couldn't quite decipher it, but he hadn't the energy needed to dwell on it any further. Instead, he set out to clean the jam, wash up, and stuff his face with one of those TV dinners he kept for absolute emergencies. What little energy he had left physically after their journey was drained by the emotional strain of their farewell scene, and not even his fondness of the culinary arts could make up for that.  
  
"That took _far_ too long... _UGH_!" Loki groaned when he finally dropped himself on the couch. The jam was all gone, the house was clean, and he was, too. The heated dinner rested on one of them couch-side trays - what else would those mortals come up with? - and he was slowly beginning to unwind. Green eyes stared at the ceiling unsteadily while certain concerns bounced about in the trickster's mind, specifically concerns for Billy. Was he taking care of himself? The boy had a tendency to neglect those duties if the right conditions were met, but then Loki did leave him in Teddy's capable hands, leaving Loki to believe the witch was being well taken care of, a thought that both reassured and depressed Loki at the same time. He had no one to do that for him - a fate Billy was mercifully spared. At least that he could do for him, Loki thought and reached for the remote control. Perhaps mindlessly staring at spectacle not of his own design would help take his mind off things, like the fact that for all the hostility and tension between them, now that the witch was gone, Loki missed Billy.   
  
It worked for a while, but eventually Loki grew tired of watching staged violence, as well as his stale dinner. He muted the TV and stared up at the ceiling again. What a hectic couple of days, he sighed before a thought crossed his mind, innocent and naive. Forget taking care of him, if only he had someone to talk to about this...  
He blinked at the realization that he did, in fact, have such a person in mind. Still he stalled, eyes trained on his phone's screen for a long moment before finally he dialed Verity's number.  
  
"At least you didn't wake me up this time."  
  
Loki smiled tiredly despite the complaint. It was better to hear Verity's voice than he thought it would be.  
  
"I'm learning."  
  
The silence that followed worried him, but then Verity chuckled and the weight lifted from his shoulders.  
"You're back, aren't you?"  
  
"You could tell already?"  
  
"It felt like you were lying to me just by using each other's voices. Now it feels right."   
  
"Now there's a word I seldom have associated with me," Loki laughed and shook his head. Then he rested his head against the couch's backrest, eyelids at half mast. "But I did it, Verity. I actually did set things _right_."  
  
"The world is filled with wonders, Loki," she reassured from the other end of the line. "You could even surprise yourself if you're not careful."  
  
"You give me far too much credit."  
  
"Someone has to."  
  
He blamed his exhaustion for having nothing to counter that with. That was the only logical reason why twice in one night now, Loki was left speechless.  
  
"I'll argue with you about that next time I see you."  
  
"Good. That leaves you free now to explain what happened."  
  
"Are you certain you don't want to hear it over your promised dinner?"  
  
Verity made a thoughtful sound as though she was considering it, only to huff a moment later. "Pass. I'd rather we talked philosophy and gossip about your neighbors some, instead."  
  
Loki snickered with a shake of his head. That _did_ sound like a good time, he had to admit, and the notion of such a thing to look forward to made it a bit easier to talk about less pleasant things - a bit. At least he was spared doing so face to face.  
  
"I messed up again, Verity. I _hurt_ _someone_ again." He heard faint rustling and could all too easily imagine how she changed into a more comfortable position.  
  
"Did you want that to happen?"  
  
There was no accusation in her voice, but the question still hit like a brick wall, leaving Loki breathless. "What?! No!" he spat out on instinct. Before, in a different life, it would've been a lie, one Verity would've easily picked up on. Now, he could feel his throat tightening in an effort to convey just how sincere he was.  
  
"I believe you," Verity reassured. "I didn't mean to accuse. If anything, you should remember you're actually a victim here, too. Or did you _want_ to switch places with him?"  
  
Loki blinked. The concept was foreign and peculiar. Him, a victim? Well, he _was_ on the receiving end of the fox's revenge, but he wronged him first, didn't he?  
  
"Either way--" Verity continued, oblivious to Loki's musings. "It sounds to me like whatever happened, you didn't mean to get Wiccan involved, let alone hurt. I hope you realize at least that much."  
  
"Funny," Loki half interjected and rested his legs on the couch, back to the arm-rest. "He actually said as much himself. We're hardly on the best of terms, mind, but... not because of this."  
  
"Wiccan sounds like a decent guy."  
  
"He is," the trickster confirmed in a fond voice. "More than I think he realizes, or is willing to admit."  
  
"You know, that sounds oddly familiar for some reason, like a certain someone I know."  
  
Loki closed his eyes, his lips pursed. He could see where this was going if he took that bait, and wasn't up to being told there was hope for him yet. After all, he wasn't yet done blaming himself for what just happened.   
"Mayhap I'll meet them one day. For now, rest assured we are both where we started, and all is well again."  
  
He could almost hear her disdain over the line's static, it was that tangible, but mercifully, she let him have his way.   
"I'll get the rest of this out of you next time, for sure. But you should rest, it sounds like even you ran out of steam, god or giant or what have you."  
  
He grinned tiredly and leaned sideways against the backrest. "Thank you. Good night, Verity."  
  
"Good night, Loki. Talk tomorrow. Late tomorrow. After the sun has been in the sky for a while."  
  
Not replying to the jab, he let the phone fall on the couch and simply stared ahead at nothing. He wasn't expecting such an aggressive show of support, and found himself still reeling from it. Verity truly was a gift he didn't deserve, he knew, and idly considered the many possibilities for their upcoming dinner. She deserved something fancy, for sure, but that was exactly why he ultimately stopped thinking it over. It required his full attention, which he couldn't quite spare at the moment. It wasn't so much the exhaustion, as much as the fact he couldn't get Billy's parting words out of his head.  
  
~ _We good?_  
  
_No! ...but not because of this.~_  
  
It was more than he deserved, or even ever dared to hope for. It was still far from forgiveness, and honestly, it was a relief to not get off the hook so easily after what he's done. Still, it wasn't complete and utter rejection and condemnation, either, at least for this most recent disaster, and could, perhaps, ultimately, spell a chance for redemption. Loki couldn't ask for more than an opportunity to set things right, especially the things he couldn't blame on his older incarnations. And if the day came where Billy did forgive him, well... one could dream, right? And that was exactly what Loki ended up doing, having fallen asleep right there on the couch.  
  
–  
  
Soft. That was the first thing to register once Billy came to. The surface he was lying on, what his head was resting on, it was all soft, and smooth, and warm, and smelled distinctly like Teddy. The reason that fact stood out so much was that it was not, in fact, rock or dirt, and that gave birth to the realization Billy had spent too much time on the ground in a forest in the past day or so. Groaning, he rolled over onto his back and stretched before pushing himself up on his elbows so he could look around. The room was mostly dark, a beacon of light piercing through it from the computer screen Teddy was staring at. The guy was slumped over, headset on and teeth digging into his lower lip. Billy couldn't help but smile at the sight, yet had to blink the next moment when he caught Teddy briefly glancing in his direction. The blond took pause and gave him a proper look, his lips pulling into a grin. He motioned with a hand, asking for a moment, before returning to the screen. Billy took the chance to stretch again while Teddy parted from his online comrades and pulled his headset off before making his way to the bed.  
  
"I was sure you'd sleep more," he admitted and turned the bedside lamp on.   
  
"You were having too much fun," Billy growled and watched with amusement as Teddy climbed into the bed, crawling over BIlly in the process to settle on his side next to him. "I had to put a stop to it."  
  
"Have we been married for that long already?"  
  
"The years _are_ beginning to pile up, Tee."  
  
"All three of them."  
  
Billy frowned as he tried to count off fingers, without any intention of succeeding. Teddy chuckled at the gesture before biting his lower lip, this time in uneasiness, Billy noted.   
  
"Hey, you mind... saying that again?"  
  
"Hm?" Billy asked in a hum, the heels of his palms buried in his eyes. Teddy stalled, only resuming when Billy finally looked at him.   
  
"My nickname."  
  
Billy stared at him for a moment before reaching to caress his cheek with a hand. Teddy tilted his head and kissed his wrist, an act that made Billy's voice sound all the warmer and sweeter.  
  
" _Tee_ ~"  
  
A shiver ran down Teddy's back, a fact that tugged Billy's smile wider. It was short lived, however, as the next moment apology tainted his expression.   
"Was it _that_ bad that I said it?"  
  
Teddy growled loudly and let out a puff of air against Billy's hand that resulted in an unflattering sound.   
"Horrible. _Mortifying_. It'll haunt me in my nightmares. I don't know what I'll do if he so much as talks about, about t-shirts, or TV, or tea and crumpets--"  
  
The flow of angry muttering against Billy's palm was brought to a stop when he tilted Teddy's head so they were looking at each other.  
"I think you're safe. He has much less reason to say that now that we're swapped back. Additionally, now that I'm not the one using those vocal chords, they're not safe from retaliation, and he knows that."  
  
The shadow that crept over Billy's eyes, along with the chilly undertone to his voice, made Teddy doubt he was fully joking - not that he could blame him, nor that he minded all too much, all things considered. Uncertain how to proceed from there, however, Teddy reached to tap a finger against the tip of Billy's nose, making the witch scrunch and wiggle it. The adorable display helped guide Teddy back to a more enjoyable, if sober, mindset.   
  
"Let me know if you feel like going back to sleep, I'll carry you over. I was going to do that if you kept snoozing for longer, anyway."  
  
Billy considered the offer, and favorably at that, yet he ultimately shook his head and sat up, a move that made Teddy pull up as well.  
  
"Rain-check. The notion of going back to sleep isn't too alluring, not with the conversation waiting for me in the morning."  
  
"So we _are_ talking about it now?" Teddy asked while Billy settled down with his knees upraised and arms resting over them. He himself had his legs slightly bent over the mattress, shoulders slumped.  
"You looked so tired earlier, I didn't want to press it, and then you went ahead and actually fell asleep..."  
  
"No better time than the present. Besides, impatient as you can be, I better fork over the answers now."  
  
"That joke will get old eventually, you know."  
  
"Yes, but you'll still let me have my nervous breakdowns."  
  
"Most likely," Teddy agreed and pulled closer to the point their shoulders touched. Billy glanced at the nonexistent space between them before giving a curt nod. Teddy nodded back, only to find the words not as easy to come by as he hoped.   
  
"I better start, then, huh."  
  
"Yeah," came the hesitant reply as Billy pulled sideways, only to lean back and bump shoulders with Teddy again. His partner remained unmoving, if seemingly amused by the gesture, distracting as it might've been. It was something he ultimately had to ignore as that wasn't a fitting mindset to be in when he said what he had to.  
  
"First question - why didn't you tell me?" The way his voice dropped let Billy know just how hurt Teddy was by it, something he had successfully kept to himself so far but was gratefully not beyond admitting it, now that they came so far. It was a relief, to have Teddy admit such things, yet it changed little how much the question hurt to hear, or how, despite not finding it unexpected, Billy was still caught unprepared. He hunched his shoulders and licked his lips, yet before he could come up with an answer, Teddy continued, proving just how ill-prepared Billy was for this conversation.  
  
"I thought we weren't keeping any more secrets from each other."   
  
To say he was ashamed was an understatement, but Billy knew it was easy to feel this way now. It didn't matter how much criticism he could dump on himself in hindsight - back then, everything seemed different.  
  
"Our link back was fragile at best, Tee--"  
  
"To the point me even being around you endangered it? So much I couldn't even _know_ \--"  
  
No, Billy knew as he closed his eyes and clenched his teeth behind pursed lips. That was excuses, all of it. He knew well why he left Teddy out of it, and yes, shame had much to do with it still.  
  
"I didn't want you to see me like that!"  
The outburst, honest and desperate, brought with it strained silence. Billy was about to pull away, but then Teddy wrapped his arm around his shoulders. It was a gentle, almost hesitant gesture, and Billy ultimately stayed put.   
  
" _That_ , I can believe."  
  
"For all the good it did me. You saw, anyway..."  
  
"You're back thanks to it. That's all that matters."  
  
Billy nodded, a weak gesture, before he leaned more heavily against Teddy. Teddy bettered his hold and smiled briefly, but then a frown took over before he continued.  
  
"Next question," he said and tried not to mind too much the way Billy tensed against him. "Which of you kept sending me text messages to keep me from putting together a search party?"  
  
The sound Billy let out in response vaguely resembled a snort. "I can't guarantee he didn't manage a couple when I wasn't looking, but for the most part, me. I imagine he'd have come up with better excuses than I did."  
  
"Yeah, a surprise project I never heard of you simply _had_ to work on, maybe even pull an all-nighter, with a nameless partner you never mentioned... it, well. It stinks."  
  
"The funny part is that it's not even that much of a lie, more of a half-truth. Guess I _have_ been spending too much time around Loki, haven't I?"  
  
"No argument here."  
  
Finally Billy uncurled and leaned back, trusting Teddy for support. It enabled him to glance at Teddy, his expression a mixture of apology and confusion.   
  
"Honestly? I expected you to come after me regardless."  
  
Teddy replied with an awkward sigh, one that made Billy even more uneasy. He tightened his hold around Billy's shoulders, hand rubbing over the guy's arm gently.  
  
"I _was_ at my limit, not gonna lie, it's just..."  
  
"Just...?" Billy pressed on when Teddy stalled. The look in the changeling's eyes when he finally looked back, gentle and caring, made Billy's chest tighten.  
  
"I figured you were having, you know... _one of your days_ , and needed space. That you'd call if something big came up."  
  
Billy hunched his shoulders and wrapped an arm around Teddy's back. "I'm sorry."  
  
Teddy shook his head, but then seemed to have a change of heart, and nodded instead.  
"Alright, so long as next time--"  
  
"I'll let you know, for sure, even if I won't let you come."  
  
"Just try and keep me away, Kaplan."  
  
The way the challenge was said drew a relieved chuckle out of Billy, who passed up arguing that he could, if he really wanted to, and instead shifted so he could rest his head against Teddy's shoulder. His partner planted a kiss on the top of his head and nuzzled into his clean, messy hair. The gestures were all endearing, and Billy was certain he would fall back asleep at this rate, but there was still a certain tension in the air that made him pull back and look at Teddy curiously. Teddy stared back almost morbidly. He sighed, a heavy, rasped sound, and Billy picked up on all the signs that showed Teddy was holding himself back before, and was now about to let it all go.  
  
"Why did you say that to him?"  
  
For a brief moment, Billy could at least pretend he didn't know what Teddy was talking about, but alas, it was a short lived illusion, leaving him frowning.   
"When I said--"  
  
"That this isn't on him," Teddy specified, more-so to speed things up than anything else. He tried to pull Billy closer, but relented when the guy pulled away instead. Billy rested one hand on an upraised knee, the other leg outstretched, his eyes staring at nothing.  
  
"I _had_ to, Tee. You weren't there, the things the fox told him--"  
  
"Were right on the money, I bet."  
  
Billy nodded at the bitter outburst, his brows knitting.   
"For sure, not a word of it false, nor uncalled for. He had it coming, every last bit."  
  
"Then why did you have to do better?"  
  
Billy held onto his arm with his opposite hand and curled up again. Why...? It was so obvious, he knew as he recalled the fox's words, spiteful yet true, the sight of Loki's back with his face in the mud, a sight Billy had every right to enjoy, yet found ultimately unsatisfying. Yes, that gnawing pit in his gut was telling. For Billy, there was never any other choice.  
  
"Because I know what it's like, Tee."  
  
"I find that hard to believe," Teddy insisted; Billy simply shook his head and uncurled, eyes aimed up at the ceiling.   
  
"But I do. Being trapped as someone you can't rightly stand? I wrote the book on that. It's not so much that you dislike yourself, or that you did anything, but it doesn't matter to the people around you. No matter how hard you try, no matter how you'll change, they won't care. They'll stop you, keep you right where you were. At every turn, they'll tell you you're horrible for nothing more than who and what you are, and _nothing_ you do can change that. _Nothing_."  
He trailed off, and Teddy could see it in his eyes, all the bad memories that surfaced. Billy closed his eyes then, and when he reopened them to look at Teddy, there was something else there, something that tugged at Teddy's chest, but not quite as painfully this time.  
"I have no idea where I'd have been without you... you, the team, hell, even the Avengers, insisting they're all wrong and that I don't suck as much, if at all... It changed my life, Tee. It changed _me_ , let me be someone I thought I wasn't allowed to be."  
  
Teddy couldn't help the stupid grin from forming. He reached for Billy's hand and was grateful when Billy not only let him take it, but held back. The sight was a lovely one, of their fingers tangled, so caught up in it he was that he missed the way Billy's expression broke, his mood shifting.  
  
"What are the odds _Loki_ has people like that?"  
  
The only reason Teddy took so long to speak was shock. He did recover, however, and could remain silent no longer.   
"Low, and rightly so, you know that better than most. And did you seriously just make that comparison?"   
  
Billy winced, uncomfortable at the phrasing, even if that's what it was, wasn't it? Still, he hadn't the luxury of staying quiet.   
  
"I haven't forgotten what he's done, Teddy, any of it, it's just--"  
  
"Just... what?" Teddy urged. "Help me out here, because I'm honestly lost."  
  
Billy shook his head before taking a deep breath. The way in which he pursed his lips added to the helpless look in his eyes, and that made Teddy back down enough for Billy to gather his wits.   
  
"I know what I saw, Tee. Back in the forest, with Loki on his knees, face in the mud, fox on his back, I..." He gasped and properly pulled away. Teddy let him, gratefully, but whether the distance made what he had to say next easier or not, he wasn't sure. He said it just the same.   
"I can't count the times I was in that position."  
  
A moment's pause in which nothing happened passed, and then a hand rested on his back, a warm presence that encouraged Billy to continue.   
"You know what the worst part is? God help me, I actually believe he's trying to do better, _be_ better. I'm the absolute _last_ person to tell him he can do it--"  
A deep inhale and and exhale later, and he managed to properly look at Teddy again.  
"But I _refuse_ to be the person to tell him he _can't_."  
  
The hand moved up from his back to his head, making Billy turn more towards Teddy before resting his hand on his forearm. He managed a small, tired smile at the warmth in Teddy's eyes, one that changed soon into a certain spark-like quality Billy knew well and loved quite a bit.  
  
"I suppose I _would_ hate being the person who stood between the nine realms and a non-evil Loki."  
  
"Right?" Billy chuckled and shook his head, only to pull Teddy's hand away and down to the mattress, his mood shifting back to sober if not morbid again.  
"That's only half of it, though."  
  
"I figured as much," Teddy admitted and kept his displeasure at the pulling of his hand to himself. The distance felt oddly necessary, so he bore with it, eyes trained on Billy's face. "It's a good reason, but it still doesn't feel enough, all things considered."  
  
Another chuckle left Billy, but it stood in stark contrast to his last, lacking any true amusement or joy. It was cold and bitter, and went well with the way he refused to meet Teddy's gaze.   
"Sometimes I think about what he's done to us, and I can't help but _laugh_. It's so spectacular, so... all-encompassing, there isn't a _single_ aspect of my life he didn't fuck with. He played me like a fiddle for _months_ , and I had to go along with it because he left me with no other choice. He made me summon that _thing_ , with _that face_ , then _my parents_ were _possessed_ , turned into goo minions... my brothers are _still_ freaking, you know that. They're far from over it. Then there's also Kate who got dragged into this, and the rest of them, too, the _Avengers_ were _puppets_ , blind to everything and as good as our _enemies_ , oh, and I still don't believe he had nothing to do with that Patriot... _thing_... and _you_!" He finally looked at Teddy again, to find him frowning back, understandably unnerved by the retelling, but holding himself back for the time being. He knew what was coming, anyway, judging by the way Billy didn't quite deflate, while his eyes dimmed further.   
"The things he said to you, just to make it easier to play us... I'm not sure where we'd have been without Dr. Strange sorting this out for us."  
  
Neither said anything for a while as they both stared at their joined hands, with Teddy sneaking glances up at Billy occasionally. The last time he did, he found that bitter smile there again, and had to wince.   
  
"Man, he sure went to great lengths... maybe I should feel _flattered_ \--"  
  
"Billy!"  
The exclamation was nothing short of mortified, but Billy wasn't letting himself be stopped this time.  
  
"But that's exactly it, Teddy!" The hold finally broke when Billy pulled up and waved his arms around, his words no longer enough for him to speak with. "He has so thoroughly _destroyed_ my life, and those of _everyone_ I care for! I have _so_ much to be angry with him for, to _hate_ him for--!"  
He stared at his partner briefly before leaning on the mattress again with his knees, hands on his lap, breath labored. His eyes searched for something over the pillow, and Teddy could spy tears forming in the corners of them. He reached on instinct to wipe them and was relieved when Billy took his hand again, even if to wipe his tears himself with his free one. When he finally resumed speaking, his voice was weak and unsteady, enough that Teddy thought his heart would honestly break.  
  
"I _can't_ hold _this_ against him too, Tee. I won't be able to handle it, I- I just don't have it in me. No spoons left to spare."  
  
Teddy offered a curt nod, and at the first signs of permission, pulled closer while Billy went on.  
  
"If I can well enough tell myself that _this_ isn't his _active_ fault... if I can somehow believe he didn't _want_ this to happen, you bet I'm damn well going to put this behind me and never look back."  
He kept far enough away to look at Teddy, and this time didn't stop him when Teddy wiped his face with the back of his fingers.  
  
"I'm not doing this for him, Tee. I'm doing this for me."  
  
Both Teddy's hands found their way to Billy's cheeks, ensuring the witch looked at him for as long as he could before he leaned closer and kissed the corners of Billy's eyes, then his forehead, then pressed their foreheads together. He told himself Billy was smiling, judging by how his eyes squinted, and that made it all worthwhile.   
  
"That... I can live with.'  
  
"Good."  
  
"It also reminds me... I don't think I told you lately what an _incredible_ person you are, William Kaplan."  
  
Billy's frown was accompanied by a scrunching of his nose. "Oh, none of that--"  
  
"All of that, c'mon, it's true, who knows you better than I do?"   
  
"...I'm too tired to have this conversation with you."  
  
"Victory!"  
  
They had pulled back enough at this point for Teddy to witness the full glory of Billy's eye-roll.  
  
"It's a _strategic retreat_ \--"  
  
"Fine, so I didn't win the war. Still won the battle!"  
  
Billy shook his head and was about to reply, but Teddy had already settled into a softer, warmer mood and pulled closer again. He wrapped his arm around Billy's shoulders, and nuzzled against his cheek.  
"I'm so sorry you had to go through that, Bee. It couldn't have been easy... it, or talking to me about it. Thank you. I'm glad we had this talk."  
  
Arm around Teddy's waist, Billy nodded in agreement, only to come to a stop with a blink. The words reminded him of something, one of the talks he had with Loki in the forest, and left him with a pit in his stomach.  
  
_~What about Teddy? Or are you going to keep the whole thing a secret from him, too?~_  
  
Billy lowered his gaze, uncertain as to how to proceed. Teddy caught on quickly and brought his free hand to Billy's chin, tilting his head up.  
  
"Bee... is there more?"  
  
Billy shut his eyes tightly before nodding. Teddy let him slip slightly out of the embrace, and was grateful when he didn't move completely away.   
  
"You can tell me, I'll listen."  
  
A nod, two, then Billy shook his head.  
  
"I can't."  
  
"Billy..."  
  
There it was again, that undertone of hurt, just loud enough to be heard over the worry. It rattled Billy enough to look straight at Teddy and rest a hand over his side, better establishing contact.  
  
"It's not a secret, I _will_ tell you, I promise! This... it's something you need to hear from _me_. It can't be anyone else. I just..." He frowned, looking at Teddy apologetically. "Not _yet_. I need more time."  
  
Teddy said nothing, and with every passing second the silence lingered, Billy grew more and more distressed.  
  
"Teddy--"  
  
A hand over his cheek and a thumb over his lips silenced him. Teddy wasn't smiling, but there was something in his eyes that, joined with the touch, let Billy relax.  
  
"You promised, and I trust you to keep your word. I'm not going anywhere."  
  
The words strummed pleasantly on Billy's mind, making him pull closer, thus missing the moment the frown rose to Teddy's face.  
  
"Just... for both our sakes, don't take too long. Take it from me, these things tend to come out one way or the other."  
  
Billy nodded, acknowledging the warning as well as the unspoken apology.  
  
"I promise."  
  
"Then I'll wait," Teddy concluded and offered a lopsided grin. "Impatient guy that I am and all. Better appreciate it, now."  
  
The expression drew a snort out of Billy, a moment before he threw himself at Teddy, holding tight.  
" _God_ , I missed you!"  
  
"I bet," Teddy replied, none of the playfulness in his voice evident in his hold as he wrapped his arms around Billy, keeping his most precious partner safe and close.   
"Welcome back, Bee. I missed you, too."  
  
_Now_ it was over, Billy finally let himself think, and rested more of his weight against Teddy, not minding how likely he was to fall asleep like this, and knowing Teddy shared the sentiment. After all, at long last, finally --  
  
"I'm home."  
  



End file.
